I Can't Stop Loving You

"Big Willie banned us from the club for a month. We still partied; we just had to travel down to Monroe, about 20 miles away. For the next two years Sandra Jean and I, along with our friends, partied in both clubs, the Oasis, in Monroe, and the Crow's Nest. We had fun and partied, partied, partied. We met new friends. They came to visit us and we visited them."

Of course being his Little Girl, I had heard all these stories before, and I knew what he was supposed to say next, but, this time was different. He was talking to Deacon Jordan. There was a long pause. I looked up and Dad was looking at me strangely. He was looking as if he was trying to decide if he should ask me to leave the room. I didn't say a word. I just stared back at him. My next words were going to be, " No Dad, I want to hear it, too." I do not know if Dad understood my reaction, or if he just felt that I was big enough to hear the rest of the story.

Dad slowly turned away, and began to talk to Deacon Jordan again.

"Deacon, every thing was fine until one night we had a little trouble down in Monroe."

Then Dad anxiously kicked his left leg straight out and pulled up his pants leg, and immediately did the same thing with his right leg. As he placed his feet back on the floor, he continued -nervously- to shuffle them as if he was trying to find the right spot on the floor to place them. He slid to the front of his chair and said to Deacon Jordan, " I am not proud of it, but I think that night led to the changing of my life."

Now I was curious! Of all the times that I had heard him talk about his past life, I had never been as attentive as that moment. My mind was racing with questions like, what could he possibly say that I have not heard? What is it? Tell us, what it is that I do not know? It was only a few seconds, but it seemed like minutes before he said another word.

"One night we were all in Monroe, at the Oasis. My wife and I, along with another couple, were sitting at a table. Two other couples, from Logan Heights, were sitting at a table behind us."

You see, Logan Heights is the name of the town where Mom and Dad lived.

"Jim Knight, also from Logan Heights, was a buddy of ours. Now he was not married. In fact, he was a playboy. All the girls thought he was good looking, and they liked his style."

Dad chuckled and said, " That Jim know he had a smooth tongue. He had a way with his women."

"I knew Jim was in the club that night, because earlier he came by our table and talked with us. We just shot the breeze until Jim spotted a certain young lady. Jim said, 'Y'all have got to excuse me, I see a fox I want to take home tonight,' and we all laughed. As he got up, he looked at me and said, ' Maurice, go tell the DJ to play something slow by Wilson Pickett.' Afterwards, he worked his way into the crowd—moving in the direction of the girl he was trying to catch up to."

"We all begin to dance and have a good time. It was really jumping that night. Sandra Jean and I had just walked off the dance floor and sat down. Then a girl ran over to our table screaming, 'They are outside beating-up your friend Jim Knight! Y'all need to help him! They are going to kill him!'

We all jumped up and ran outside. Over to our left, we saw a lot of commotion, so we charged in that direction. The closer we got, the more people seemed to move aside, as if they were saying, 'Come on and help your friend.' Just before we got in striking range, I could see five or six guys beating and kicking Jim. I knew it was him, because I remembered what he was wearing. By that time, June Bug Lee, who was almost step for step with me, said, 'Maurice, you better get your knife.' I reached down in my sock and got my knife. By the time I popped the blade, I heard Sandra Jean scream, 'Maurice no!' Then the fight was on. Deac, there were so many sticks, fists and knife blades swinging out there, it's a wonder we all were not killed."

Then Dad glanced at me and said, "We fought like fools. We put our lives on the line like we were trying to defend the invasion of America."

While Daddy was away, Mama and I lived alone. I was scared to sleep by myself, so I would get in bed with Mama. After I was asleep, many times she would carry me to my bedroom and tuck me in bed. Most of the time I would sleep all night, but there were many nights when I would wake up and cry out for her.

One night while sleeping in my bed, I was roused by a strange sound. Instead of crying out, I got out of bed and walked into Mama's bedroom. It was dark, except for the moonlight shining through the window. I could see someone in Mama's bed, on top of her. She was making a sound, and she appeared as if she couldn't push the person off her. I screamed out. I guess I scared him because they scrambled like two pigs in a bagging sack.

One day Mama and I was grocery shopping, when Mrs. Ford—whom I did not know at the time—approached Mama and began shouting at her. Trying to avoid Mrs. Ford, Mama turned her grocery cart around, took me by the hand, and began to walk away. Mrs. Ford seemed to have gotten madder. She shouted even louder. As we walked, Mrs. Ford continued to shout, "Bitch, don't you walk away from me when I am talking to you. I will kick your ass, you low-life whore."

Suddenly, both of them were shouting at each other. It was hard to understand what was being said, but at one point I heard Mama clearly. "I don't want your sorry ass man."