Finding Your Way Through The Gray

Earlier in the book I discussed what I call the 3 B’s—be assertive, bedazzle, and be courteous.  As powerful as these are, and as much emphasis I have tried to place on skills that enable us to harness our potential, none are as important as the 4^th B—Be Truthful.   Because it is so important, it is worthy of a chapter unto its own.  The 4^th B is about two things: Being truthful to yourself and being truthful to others.

Being truthful to yourself is important.  Finding your way through the gray requires that we be completely honest with ourselves.  Without doing so, or by clouding our thoughts with false impressions or beliefs, we eliminate the need to see things in other ways.  Imagine that our minds are like computers.  Lying to ourself or being reluctant to approach situations as they really are is like trying to process two very different programs simultaneously.  Unlike computers, it is not possible for humans to be efficient with both.

Being truthful to others is also critical in order to successfully manage the gray.   I have met a lot of people who fear the gray because of bad experiences they have had.  Too often, “the gray area” can be a scapegoat for wishy washy behavior.  Let people know where you stand and stand there.  The big gray picture involving choices at work, at home, and about life’s direction are already unclear.  Failure to maintain personal integrity can become like a box closing in on you limiting the opportunity to live in the gray and harness your potential. 

Honesty is the best policy…and living a life with that guiding principle is key to the idea of finding your way through the gray.