How To Love Someone to Death
by
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The truth is simple. Death and dying are frightening. Most of us are afraid to face death, as well as the process of dying. That’s ok, as many of us are not taught very much about the concept of dying, or how to accept death, or even how to talk about it.
The offering of this book is to give the reader some simple guidance of how to approach your own process to loving someone to death. The focus of this book is on receiving the news that a person you love or care about has a terminal condition. When we receive the news that someone we care for has a terminal condition, we are first faced with concern for our Loved-one, and the discomfort of adjusting to the news. Then, we are faced with ourselves, and we start to ask the internal question of, “What do I do?”
When someone you love is faced with the reality that his or her life is going to end within a certain amount of time, it is a natural response to feel panic and fear. But there are steps you can take to rise above that fear. These steps are not difficult, but they do take time to learn.
The chapters in this book are based on personal insights from my experience working directly with patients as a hospice volunteer. These reflections of the work I have done with such special people that I have loved to death are written here to serve as tools for the reader. I hope that you find in these experiences, guidance that will allow you the courage and strength to use while taking time out of your own life, to love and support another human being to the end of theirs. These chapters provide gentle guidelines for you to read and think about in preparation for the time you will spend with a loved-one who is dying.
I cannot over emphasize how normal and okay it is to feel uncertain, or fearful about taking that step into the world of loss, and sharing the experience of watching a Loved-one leave this life. The experience at first can be very scary. It can be very painful. It can be very challenging. But believe this ~ as scary and as painful and as challenging as it can be, it can also be other things as well, such as a deepening of connection to your Loved-one, insight into your own personal strength and courage, an enlightenment of truths – both spoken and unspoken, an awakening of your spirit, and most importantly, an expression of unconditional love that will envelope and comfort your Loved-one as he or she prepares to leave this life behind ~ and those other things are well worth the devotion and commitment it took to make the decision to do this.
This book is only meant to offer guidance based on very simple suggestions to help the reader open his or her mind and heart to the process of dying.
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About the Book
Have you ever wondered what you would do if you received the news that someone you love or care about was going to die? For many people, the very thought of losing someone to a terminal illness or a condition due to a sudden accident that leaves an individual close to death, is not only stressful and anxiety-producing, but without warning creates an avalanche of fearful emotions that leave many of us unsure as to what to do. This book is a simple guide to the reader on how to approach the subject of being there and participating in the end-of-life process for an individual who is about to die. Loving someone to death is about careful choices to understand and support the dying, and to manage the conflicting, and often times fearful emotions, that surface for care-givers during this time.
About the Author
Lou Bacon began working as a direct-service volunteer for a Hospice organization in southern Lou teaches at the college level, practiced as a mental-health therapist, runs bereavement support-groups, personal empowerment workshops and is highly accomplished in the art of presenting soft-skills instruction. Lou welcomes your insights into this process of caring for and loving people into their deaths, and can be reached at LJBacon@gmail.com.