BANKERS' HOURS
An Exciting Reminiscence of the 1970s When Men Were Men and Savings & Loans Were Solvent
by
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The first page in the New Employee’s Manual begins with, “Welcome to Sunshine Savings and Loan Association. We hope you’ll be happy here and we wish you every bit of good luck in performing your assigned duties, which will include everything from balancing a financial statement to meeting the pubic. Work hard, keep your nose clean and all good things will come to you. We have every confidence that our association will be a fruitful one.” That part about keeping our noses clean obviously didn’t apply to Mr. Harmon G. Becker, but I sure was looking forward to meeting some pubics. This manual, which was the brainchild, I later discovered, of dear old Froedrich Huntmauser, combined all the charm and style of Peter Pan with The Curse of Dracula. I also learned the “fruitful association” meant Sunshine Savings had several homosexuals cavorting in the mail room. All things considered, however, and looking back on those first halcyon days as a management trainee, I realized that the New Employee’s Manual was a fitting and proper introduction to this, my chosen career. As I meander through the memories of my first year and a half with Sunshine Savings and Loan Association (all of which time was spent as a New Accounts/ Teller/ Clerk/ Administrative Trainee/ gofer/ flunky), I find that time has not dulled the wonder of those months. The days were rapid, joyous, challenging, frustrating, enlightening. My boyish naiveté was quickly, rudely, thoroughly crushed under the ever-rolling wheels of big business and I feared many times I would end up a roadkill on the dangerous highways and biways of high finance. “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times....” It was like going through the French Revolution as an Aristo. It was days of angry customers who tried to con us out of expensive premium giveaways for a lousy $10 savings account; days of opening savings accounts for animals (not all of whom walked on four legs); days of complaining around the employee lunch room about the failure of management to understand the plight or problems of us poor line people; days of, “I can’t find the Goddamn three dollars - throw it into the Cash Short account and let’s get the Hell out of here;” days and nights of propositions and teary-eyed tellers and gossiping harpies and piddly raises and long hours and learning, learning, learning.
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About the Book
AND YOU THOUGHT YOUR MONEY WAS SAFE!
The newest book by Gary Lukatch, Banker’s Hours, is a deeply disturbing slog through the pain-filled ditches of
Comments from some of the unsuspecting innocents who were sucked into buying this book because of the great cover:
“Who wrote this junk?” R.H. Silver, former S&L Assistant Vice President, Yreka, California
“Who published this piece of garbage?” R. Wellen, retired S&L Executive, Yorba Linda, California
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“Makes a GREAT birdcage liner.” Neddy Seagoon, Book Reviewer,
“I’m glad I got a free copy, because I’d never pay good money for this crap.” Sneed Hearn, Literary Critic,
“ALRIGHT! After 25 years my Dad finally got this thing published.” Morgan Lukatch Pellettera, Author’s Smartass Daughter
“I LOVE this book. I bought 53 copies to give to friends and I even wrote the New York Times Book Review people to put it on their Best Seller list. I can’t say enough great things about this wonderful book.” Carolyn Lukatch, Author’s Mother (deceased).
“Hey, Buddy, review THIS!” Irate Husband of Former Girlfriend
“ ‘Tain’t funny, McGee!” Molly
About the Author
Gary Lukatch was born in
He is also the author of one other work, To Úr With Love, a semi-autobiographical jaunt through his second life. In addition, he has written many C&W song lyrics, sadly all unpublished and unsung (literally and figuratively), including such should-be classics as: If You Can’t Live Without Me How Come You Aren’t Dead; If Fingerprints Were Left On Skin I Wonder Whose I’d Find On You; and the crowd-pleasing The Ballad of Onan.
He has been inside an Egyptian pyramid, visited an Istanbul Turkish Bath, backed up quickly from the snake charmers in Marrakech, crewed an
For those of you who are REALLY interested, he can be contacted at:
Teachrman@yahoo.com.