Chains of Gold

EXCERPT FROM CHAINS OF GOLD The shadows in the dark waters of Lake Erie beckoned Charlie O'Malley to throw himself into their roiling grave. The intense pain and the hopelessness of his situation caused him to step closer to the precipice. The façade of a grave in the dark water seemed to be welcome arms compared to the torture in his heart and emotions. Darkness swallowed him on the small isolated peninsula home of the weather-beaten lighthouse and allowed him to pour out his soul for anyone to hear. But, there was no one to hear. The regular revolutions of the brilliant beam of light from the lighthouse towering above him sent streaks of light across Lake Erie. Its piercing light was a beacon for the weary seafarers up the Niagara River guiding them out of the peril of the dark waters to a safe place of calm. But, there was no light to guide Charlie to a place of calm. Blinded by his despair, he failed to reach into the depth of his soul to grasp the hand of the one who calmed the waters. Every minuscule of hope was obliterated by his pain. In his despair, he failed to turn to the only deliverer known to man. There was calm to be found, but he would have to reach up to obtain it. The muscles of Charlie's jaws tightened and relaxed rhythmically as anger made his temples throb. Oblivious to the peril of the shadows in the dark waters, he raised his fist in the air and screamed out at the angry storm rapidly approaching. "Why, God, Why? Why did I have to lose her? I have no one! I've lost everything and everyone else! Please don't take Jewel away from me!" It seemed even God was not listening. He needed someone to answer his questions. But, there was no one to answer. Waves pounded against the rocks and sent a fine spray of water across the small peninsula, which held the lighthouse - and one brokenhearted, lonesome soul. He wept until his eyes were puffy and his throat sore and swollen, restricting sound. His voice was hoarse from screaming out his questions and pain to someone who would understand. But, there was no one to understand. Only the shadows in the dark waters and omniscient God knew the intensity of his pain but Charlie almost forgot the loving God who is a refuge in times of trouble. Waves roiled across the lake, their destination, the rocky shoals and embankments, which kept Lake Erie out of the city of Buffalo, New York. Now they beckoned to Charlie as they fiercely rammed against the rocks twenty feet below, daring him to immerse his pain in their frothy billows. It could be over so quickly. No more pain. No more hurt. There's no other way. No way to overcome this hurt. This is the way…the way…the way. Charlie stuck his hands deep into his pockets. The fingers of his right hand touched a metallic object. There was no wondering what it was. He knew. He clutched it tightly in his fist. It had been in his pocket for a long time. Each time he changed pants he transferred it, keeping it with him at all times. He eased his hand out of his pocket and opened his fist. There it was. The answer to his pain, but tonight it did not seem to offer relief from his pain, sorrow and sadness. It was only a cold, inanimate object, which in itself had no power. The darkness prevented him from seeing it clearly but he did not wonder its form, color nor for what it was intended. A quick revolution of the light in the lighthouse made it glint briefly in his open hand. He closed his eyes and stepped closer to the edge of the embankment. He was deceived by the great deceiver, Satan into thinking the peril of the dark waters was the solution to his pain. How could he possibly serve God if he gave in to the powerful urging inside?