Reflections and Impressions

AFTERWARDS

When life is filled with pain

And death and agony prolonged,

My mind begins to dream of afterwards.

I think that life will change – afterwards.

I’ll live again and dream again – afterwards.

Play again and hope again – afterwards.

I’ll forget the grief and worry –

And leave it all behind –afterwards.

And then I suddenly realize that afterwards is here.

But it’s not what I imagined,

And not what I had hoped.

For afterwards is just the time

When, what is no more.

When the troubles once you had, you have no more.

When the dying’s done, the loved one gone

When the battle’s fought and over

Or when all your ills have left.

Then afterwards is here,

But with it come the memories of before.

Memories that haunt my daily life

And cover all I do with the mist of yesterday.

My eyes are clouded, my vision blurred,

My mind bedimmed with old misdeeds

And ancient fears, weaving cobwebs of despair.

Will my afterwards become a brave new world

Or will it always be,

Just living yesterday alone?

THE UNREACHABLE ONE

The essayists

Psychologists

Scientists

And humanists

All say that man’s gregarious

And whether he is nefarious

Capricious or hilarious

He needs to be connected

To his fellowmen,

But there may be an exception

Who know from his conception

That he’ll get a cool reception

From Homo Sapiens.

So he builds a wall

Around himself

And toughens it with pain.

Then he fills his inner world

With illusionary

Visionary

Imaginary friends.

He thinks they will be pliable

And flexible and friable

But finds instead they soon create a life that’s all their own.

Sometimes they can be affable

Or laughable

Or wrathful

Their mood can change like lightening

And be frightening

Or exciting.

But the wall remains impenetrable.

No one else can get inside.

Any efforts made to pierce it

May be recommendable

Defensible

Commendable

But results will be lamentable

And efforts seems expendable

‘Cause this solid, stubborn wall will fail to tumble down.