I write this book for my sweet son David—to honor his courage and fortitude in dealing with Bipolar; and in the last year and a half of his life with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. (OCD)
I write this book in the hope of helping others understand the extraordinary suffering, loss of dignity, accompanied by the shame and embarrassment caused by the stigma of mental illness and painful side effects of medications.
I need to inform and shed some understanding about mental illness while at the same time tell the world some of David's story. I, his mother, honor him for all that he was. David's generosity, kindness, compassion and fortitude, had no bounds. His life had not been lived in vain; no life is. He made a difference. His journey must be told. I hope this book will accomplish that.
Countless doctors' drugs and endless blood tests, David endured so much pain; emotional and physical. He hid much from his family and friends; only through his music and lyrics did he express his sadness, rage, and loss of dignity.
Bipolar is a medical illness. It is usually thrust upon young adults in their late teens. Lithium helped David stabilize his mood, which, mainly exhibited as manic episodes. Brain scans have shown the brain is like a circuit board; the mother of circuit boards, with ideas and electrical impulses racing around the circuit.
The feeling of being on top of the world, in control, capable of doing and accomplishing several tasks and projects all at the same time—then of course... many, which do not come to fruition; consequently cause feelings of sadness, disappointment, irritability, and depression.
I wanted to write this book in order to speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves. We need officials of government to support more funding and research necessary to educate society to work toward erasing the number one problem of pain of stigma.
Hospitals and mental facilities must give better, more compassionate care to those suffering the extraordinary loneliness of battling mental illness. Our elected officials need to create legislation reducing the huge financial burden put upon the patient's family. As better funding and treatment becomes available for all young men and women who endure this pain and loss of dignity, we will begin to erase their reoccurring suffering.
The brain is an organ of the body, and mental illness is a medical illness. Individuals with mental Illness are not apart from us. They live among us as writers, artists, musicians, mathematicians, architects, poets, actors etc. They are highly sensitive, creative, and intelligent human beings worthy of love, compassion, respect, and kindness.
To my dear son David; You are always with me in spirit. I thank you with all my heart for all the joyous times we shared; as well the sad times in which you have taught me so much. I will never forget your ironic humor and all our laughter. It is those warm and treasured memories that give me the strength and sustenance to carry on each day, as the grief at times feels almost unbearable.
Dave, we have been blessed. We experienced real love and respect for each other. I honor you each day by living my life the way I know you would want me to. Until I am reunited with you, Dad Lino, and Grandma Stella...
Ciao, il mio Tesoro (my treasure) Con Amore e Abbraccio Forte, Forte (With love & strong hugs)
Mamma
THE YOUNG YEARS
June, 1969 I, Loretta Belarski married Pasqualino Franchini. We were so much in love and we had a wonderful dream to go back to Lino's home; a beautiful seaside village in Italy called Cattolica. We planned, worked and saved for our future and our dream.
Dreams Do Come True
In 1972 it became a reality; we moved there permanently. My greatest joy occurred in 1976 when I gave birth to a beautiful, healthy boy. We called him `David'. While Lino and I managed our small family hotel, young David was off to nursery school.
The next five years were of extraordinary happiness. The bumps on my arm come to life every time I envision "Babbo" (Papa) Lino holding David's hand as he walked him to esilo. (Nursery school)
THE 12 to 19 YEARS - “Good Times Sad Times”
August 7, 1989. David's Dad dies of Kidney failure at fifty three years of age. David watched his father being put into an ambulance only to never return home.
I knew in my heart David's reaction demonstrated extreme emotional pain and suffering. He took all his father's framed photographs and turned them flat down.
Bipolar Disorder - “A Drastic Change Occurs”
"On your own, your plans just fall apart
You can feel the needle in your heart;