"Cold. Help me. I’m cold. Please help me. Dear God, how it hurts. Help me. Someone, can you hear me." A petite, grayish-haired woman looked up from her bed at the doctor towering over her, like a god.
"Shh. You’re ok. A small prick. A short hurt and then you’ll feel better."
"You can help me? Thank you."
"In just a minute, you'll feel better, I promise." The doctor smiled and patted his patient gently on her arm.
"It hurts. So cold, I am so cold," she repeated, her eyes begging, but hopeful.
"It’s going to feel cold for just a little more time. Just a small pain and then there will be no pain, I promise." The doctor touched her gently, lifting up her arm while he spoke. "Now, I am taking your arm. A pinch and that's all. You'll be finished with this soon." The doctor spoke with a calm, soothing tone and placed the needle on the inner side of her arm at the elbow.
The woman, relaxed by the sound of his voice and the warmth of his eyes, still winced as the needle went into her arm.
"Ouch," she said. "The needle is thick. It hurts."
The doctor put the needle in a sharps box. He stuck the box in a pocket of his white jacket. He placed his fingers together so they resembled the steeple of a church.
"Shh. Sweetie, you’re going to be fine," he said softly. "Here, I’ll pray with you while the shot starts to work. The Lord is my shepherd…."
"It feels like a snake," she cried, panic in her voice. "A snake is crawling up my legs. They’re numb and the snake is climbing higher. I'm scared. She gasped, whispering, "Help me. It hurts to breathe. I can't breathe…" She became silent, eyes fearful.
"You will feel better in a moment. I shall not want...."
"The snake -- my neck -- help choking meeeee. . ." She wheezed out the words, panicked, scared eyes staring at the doctor, begging him for help. She became silent, staring forward, eyes seeing nothing.
"Relax, you are going to be fine, the doctor said, stroking her arm above the shot while he talked. "Close your eyes. I’m here. He leadeth me..."
"Maggie. Maggie. Maggie. Can you hear me? Nurse, intern, get in here immediately, quick, emergency." The doctor called loudly.
His patient had stopped breathing.
The nurse came running.
The doctor closed the eyes of his patient while the nurse looked. The doctor sighed deeply.
"Maggie Williams. Nice lady. About 72 or 73. Dead. Why? Don’t know. Heart, it looks like. Stopped breathing. A 'do not resuscitate' order on her chart. Can't do anything more for her."
The nurse stared at the doctor and glanced down at the patient. She reached for the woman's arm and felt no pulse. She spoke slowly, deliberately, looking at the doctor as she spoke.
“So, doctor, what happened? What caused death?”
"Damn, nurse." He looked tearfully at the thirtyish woman standing nearby and continued talking.
"I’m supposed to be smart. How can they say I am smart when I don’t know this. A nice woman. She wanted so much to live. We talked just yesterday when I did my rounds."
“I hate to say this, but I think you need to have an autopsy performed to determine what happened to her," the nurse said. The doctor didn't respond.
"Her chart says she came in with a high temperature, pains, a flu with complications," the nurse continued. "She should have made it. I don’t quite understand this.”
“Heart. It looks like her heart stopped at 6:55," the doctor snapped. "Write that as the cause of death."
The doctor looked at the nurse, who still had not moved. "Question my judgment question your right to a job,” he said, softly, glaring at her as he spoke.
The nurse stared at him for several minutes. Then, she wrote as directed.
“OK, family?” she asked, looking at the doctor.
"None, nurse, would you please call someone to have the body removed.
"I still think we should have an autopsy to verify the cause of death." She stammered out the words, looking down at her feet as she spoke. She gulped twice and looked the doctor in the eyes.
"No," he said sternly. "It was her heart. Sometimes, they just break, you know."