A cluster of familiar women stood near the other
door looking out at the others in the grass with the football. They were caught up in the most recent
interception and didn’t see him walk tall and fast across the kitchen to the
door leading into the dining room of the sprawling New England farm house. Gregory passed through and sat on the deep
high back leather couch in the living room, looking at the room and its
furniture; across the room he knew so
well, his eyes fell and rested on the black enamel hand painted grand
piano. Gregory was aware of no other
thing or person, his entire attention drawn to the gleaming black piano.
Benjamin quietly slipped in the front door of the
house after seeing Gregory enter the side.
He knew today was a special day for him and had been excited most of the
week when he knew he would finally see Gregory again. Through all the years they had known each other, Benjamin had
felt a blossoming draw and affection for Gregory. The time and words had never presented themselves to tell Gregory
about his affection though they were very good friends. Today was to be the day. He now knew that all things meant to happen
would, in the right time and place.
It’s far more important to prepare for life in general and be ready for
anything that’s to come, than it is to take everything as it comes, hoping it’s
not too bad. Benjamin had far better
luck anticipating some of the things that had happened to others, taking the
necessary precautions so that he could avoid their short falls, or soften the
blows if it was necessary to follow where others had failed. This being the appointed day, it was just a
matter of being aware of the right time to do whatever he felt was correct; to
somehow show Gregory the desires he harbored.
True confidence didn’t, however, stop him from having some fear of
transgressing the unknown. As he
entered the house in search of Gregory, he thought he was ready for what he
must do, though still not knowing exactly what it was he was about to do. Mostly because it was something he had never
done before.
Benjamin found Gregory seated at the piano with his
fingers poised over the white ivory keys staring at a sheet of music standing
open in front of his eyes. Slowly,
approaching from the far side of the room, studying the straight still back
that folded at the breech to lie firm upon the bench, Benjamin stared as though
he had never seen him before. The
straight long lean legs were at a perfect right angle as if the bench had been
precisely constructed for this particular person; the face showed the light of
life even from the side. Gregory's
majestic arms hung poised as if in anticipation of the first note to be struck
by an awaiting orchestra. As Benjamin
slipped onto the bench, Gregory turned to him with eyes shining, his full lips
barely parted in the most elegant smile Benjamin had ever seen. He couldn’t stop himself as he found his
mouth drawn to Gregory's simple beaming smile.
Their lips touched and he felt the faintest shudder run through
Gregory's body, as a wave of pleasure surged through him and he knew that this
was what he had wanted to do and this had been the time to do it. For some seconds they sat in a soft
lingering caress of lips until Benjamin looked up and into Gregory's eyes, as
if to say, 'and you too?!'
Shouts and bounding foot steps on the veranda
outside sent Benjamin's eyes to the music and his fingers to the keys as he
began to play a piece as though he had been born of it. Gregory could only watch in wonder, though
not at the playing; at the person who sat on the bench beside him. They had wanted each other all the
while. As he asked himself why he had
not drawn nearer to Benjamin sooner, he understood that the time had not yet
been right; now it was.
Shouts outside signaled the call to dinner, followed
quickly by loud ringing from a heavy brass bell hung at the side door of the
house, on the porch. Benjamin lifted
his hands from the keys of the piano and as he stood touched the inside of
Gregory’s leg lighter than a feather for the briefest moment. Together, they walked into the kitchen where
Benjamin went out through the door to the table. Gregory went into the bathroom, closed the door and looked at
himself in the oval cut mirror hanging in a polished oak frame over the large
marble basin. Coming to compose himself
after the encounter at the piano, he caught only his own gaze in the mirror and
held it transfixed.
Gregory stood several seconds trying to decide if he
felt joy or fear, love or hate. Both
possibilities still existed at that moment.
To accept the joy and love, over the fear and hate would require him to
hold as fallacious the learning of so many years and the invalidating of so
many people he held dear. To choose the fear and hate over the joy and love
would deny him one of the few things in his life that had ever held such a
feeling and the ebullition that accompanied it. Gregory smiled, knowing there was no reason to consider the
decision any longer. He could no longer
postpone the inevitable and create more confusion in this area of his life that
really needed some clarifying. A feeling of gratefulness at having a friend
like Benjamin to see this through with gave him the strength to accept and
continue.
In that moment of decision he grew in height and his
skin felt tauter on his already lean body.
His eyes returned to the shining deep blue of earlier years and he left
the room with a composed understanding of what his direction was to be from
this point on. The change was so remarkable
that others sitting at t