The Broken Toy

Introduction

If only someone would have told me how everything would turn out and been able to predict the future of my son’s life I could have relaxed. If only I had known what a wonderful young man Dan would become, the anxiety I felt would have lessened. The dilemma was that no one knew and no predictions were made about Danny’s abilities and future life.

I kept the scariest possibilities hidden and unspoken to all that met us, including my closest family and friends. The thought that Daniel might not develop or progress at all was always on my mind.  Since there was no group that Dan fit into, and no one able to suggest the direction to take with and for him, I was left to push, teach, and try to convince others and myself that Dan had a future filled with endless possibilities. After all, he was born with the same abilities, wasn’t he? He was just behind and would soon catch up, wouldn’t he? These are the questions that I constantly asked myself. As time went on I wondered if I or anyone else would be able to or want to answer those very questions.

When your baby is born you feel the surge of joy and hope that your child will be the next great doctor, lawyer, scientist, president, or other successful and famous person. The very least that you imagine is that he or she will solve some of the world’s problems, and of course contribute to society. How then can you reconcile this with the reality that your child might be retarded? I, for one, was in denial and that was my way of dealing with the difficult situation.

Raising a child is not comparable to following a cookbook recipe, and many variables will affect the outcome. Still, we know each parent’s in-put molds the outcome of a child’s development. I am therefore hopeful that our life experiences will help each and every parent searching for assistance in raising their special needs child.

If only I had known Danny had FragileX Syndrome, the assistance I would have received from experts in the field would have enabled me to expand upon my knowledge that was acquired only through a lifetime of trial and error. The information available now at the click of a mouse or a trip to the library was unavailable to me. The resources are there today and I encourage you to avail yourself of every opportunity to gain as much knowledge as possible to aid in the development of your special needs child.

As you will read in the subsequent chapters I did not come to terms with his limitations until much later. I instead focused all of my energies on his progress and working with him on a daily basis. I now believe that it was this mindset that allowed for his success.