Earth High School

1. THE BET!

“Maybe we need a woman President in next year’s 2008 election.”

As he reaches over the counter to accept his breakfast from you, the fact you hit a nerve is quite apparent when he bellows, “A woman? Rarely can a woman intellectualize and reason. All they do is feel, not think. Hence, they can’t run a business well, solve problems like a man, do big things at the office, let alone be President of the United States.”

“Robby, surely you’re kidding – a big act, right? Yet lately you go ballistic if I disagree, and in this conversation it seems men are emotional, and females logical. It’s the end of 2007. Where have you been Neanderthal man? I didn’t know you still existed. When I venture out, do you always have to drag me by my hair back to our cave?
“So why haven’t ya read the book I gave you titled, Nine and Counting, about the accomplishments of women Senators back then? At least I didn’t give you She Wins, You Win, by Gail Evans. Or Elizabeth Simpson Smith’s, Breakthrough: Women In Aviation.”

“Just nine women, nine percent?”

“There were up to 14 in the 2004 election! What’s their Women’s Team Senators voice today?”

“Try again. You get a job? What a wild idea. Because of me, you’ve the life of a Queen!”

“Honey, I know you must get to your law firm, but we have to talk.”

“Okay. Make your speech Mrs. Robby England….”

“It’s not as if hanging at the Country Club gets old. Yet now perhaps I work for my paycheck, and not just help you get yours. I’d be a part of the, say, 150 million in the United States who bring home the bacon! – A woman in business. My thought is – ‘I ought to try it!’ After these decades together with you, my new idea of working a job makes me feel good, however unbelievable that may sound.”

“What the heck do you know about work? You had financially successful parents who put you through school. If it weren’t for bad investments and medical bills, they would have left you some money. I caught you in college, and with my family’s law school fund became such a good lawyer, you never had to get a job. We’ve been surfing ever since. – Yes, you’ve never had to work.”

“Like the wife and Mom hats are a piece of cake?” you laugh. “How dare you say I’ve never, worked?
“Yet honestly, Rob, all day long now, whether it’s at home, doing errands, or being with friends at the Club, I feel empty. Something’s missing. There’s a void I need to fill, almost like an addiction.”

“You’re just going through a phase, Sheila. It’ll pass.”

“I don’t think that’s it, Robby. The idea I’m sharing is about me feeling right – living this new dream I have. At this time in my life, I’m without a goal of having to give it all I’ve got! And since our kids are in high school, going more their own way, frankly, I’ve felt lost. I even feel guilty because my days are designed to be nothing but enjoyment, kind of like in Billy Joel’s song, ‘I’ve Loved These Days.’
“So there’s got to be something else to make me feel more alive than hitting golf balls, buying groceries, getting dinner, and relaxing on cruise control all day and evening. Plus, I imagine it would be fun to be with friends on the selling side of the counter, and fun to really learn how to sell!
“Truthfully, Mr. England, it’s scary to say, I want to experience myself separate from you, and not solely be your wife. I want to develop my identity as an individual, such as when I was Sheila Lake, before we married.
“It’s like you wanting to be ‘a househusband’ because you don’t have a non-paycheck-working side, as if I was supporting us. – Could you handle me bringing in more than you?”

This comment stuns Rob like a deathblow, as you try to conclude: “Believe it or not, it’s hard to not work, and to just bum around like when picking up stuff at the supermarket, the tailors, browsing again and again in the bookstores, reading, and trying to find something I want to do now. So I could use your support and encouragement for me wanting to be more productive. I’d experience what it’s like working to feed myself, living for my next paycheck, or I’m – under the bridge!”

Bewildered, he asks, “Honey, we talked about it last night, and all morning upstairs, and I still don’t understand what exactly you’re saying. Do you really have an advertising writing, copywriter job, back in your hometown? You’re telling me Plan A is for you to start with $3,000 dollars capital, and just one of your clean credit cards, to receive paychecks all the way perhaps to the year 2017, because you just like the number? It’s loony.”

“Rob, I feel being on my own would make me work to my utmost, and peak my awareness all week. Working now when we don’t need my gold dust, doesn’t have the same zest and immediacy. If I got fi red, it wouldn’t matter to me financially. I wouldn’t have to make money, because you’re such a big deal!”

“Cripe. Being from the high school class of 1972, using your phrase, we’re 53 – ‘trips around the sun.’ So if the ad writer job doesn’t pan out, are you going to bag groceries for minimum-wage, even if you can afford a place in a cheap rooming house? End of discussion.”
Now the silence is too loud, even for him. Therefore, as if concluding his case in court, he speaks, “Since agrarian society, the men had the brains to go out and fight the invaders, to protect their territory and families.”

“Have you considered our world’s violent disagreements are because not enough women are politically involved? They say there is an imbalance – a lack of female input. It seems males are still solely making all the decisions. I was watching the TV History channel, and there was a female Pharaoh we’re not supposed to know about, appreciate and….”

Over-riding your voice, in deep male sound, he orders, “Just tend to the kids and the garden. You’re in ‘the nest’ watching the woodchucks in the backyard out the kitchen window all day. Relax and enjoy it!”

“Husband, it’s not because I want to be financially insecure. It’s to experience the feeling only financial insecurity can give me. I don’t know what it’s like to be concerned about income and cash flow, and to be financially responsible for my own well-being – not my parents or you.”
Then to lighten things up, you ask, “By the way, is the word ‘cool’ ever mentioned in court to the Judge?”

“Yes. Attorneys say ‘cool breeze’ quite often during opening remarks.”

“No, really, I’m….”

You see your husband speed on to avoid a real discussion, and to not lose this exchange, especially with his wife. Matter of fact and in convincing tone, he informs, “Well, you might as well forget it, Sheila.
You could never make it on your own.”

That remark is the last straw. Your pressure builds to the point you express – “Oh, I wouldn’t be too sure about that, Buster!”

Then with one quick impulsive move, he smiles, thrusts his chair back, stands, and fl at-out declares – “I’ll bet you a million dollars you can’t survive financially on your own, without me.”