Strong Sons: The Tunnel Journey

YOU ARE UP FOR DISCUSSION “Who am I?” This is a worthy question not often asked enough to one's self or to others, and this is because the answer usually denotes dedication, responsibility and the pressure of being. You can discover who you are by the things you do best. Take the time out and discover who you really are. Take initiatives to define yourself and you will be amazed at the outcome. Loving yourself is important as well as allowing yourself to develop values for the maturation process to nurture your spiritual growth. Furthermore, you should be in position to urge yourself to explore different topics that may interest you. Proceed with caution, but do not be afraid of the controversial subjects in asking questions that you don't understand. The only question that is dumb is the one you are afraid to ask, and never asked. I once had a counseling session with Shawn and carefully listened as he expressed the way he felt about himself. Shawn was extremely insecure about the way he looked. I couldn't disagree more as I faced one of the most handsome sons I was privileged to have met. Shawn had one particular incident in high school, while wearing a pair of shorts to class. In the process his friends teased and laughed at him referring to how `scrawny' he looked. As a result, Shawn refused to wear shorts except in the privacy of his home. He was also afraid of intimate relationships because he feared that if his mate got too close to him, she would also discover how skinny he was and not want to be with him. Thus, he would only date girls that he could control. The situation lent itself to him being afraid to pursue the girls that he truly believed were ideal for him. Shawn's insecurities drove him into an engagement with a girl he was not in love with. He later admitted that he was only in love with the fact that she moved at his every `beck and call'. One should give thorough consideration to the implications of their actions. Due to his underlying fear and low self-esteem, Shawn did not take the time out to analyze how the decisions that he made would have stifled his future plans. Low self-esteem has no part in the body of Christ. If this exists with you please find a church counselor and get rid of that demon of deception. All of us were born as special, unique, and tailored individuals. If you find this problem to be a part of you, then rise, admit it, quit it and forget it! You've probably found yourself thinking at times that everyone else is better than you are, looks better, and dresses better. Or you feel that you are not wanted, not loved; you wish you could be as smart as the next person, dress, dance, sing, and talk like someone else. There are a plethora of published reports alluding to the validity of this problem. Don't be ashamed if your image is not what it should be. There are applications and solutions that you can grasp that will help you. Psychologically speaking, sons tend to think that they are supposed to be macho and that everything will eventually fall into place. As a result of this mind set, it is often difficult for them to think outside of the box or to adapt to a new way of thinking. According to Einstein, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.” A SILVER LINING: MY TIME TO DECIDE You're at a pivotal moment and timing is everything. So sons along the way don't be afraid to open up. You are created in the image of God, so you have an innate desire to communicate with others. God gave you dominion and power to do and accomplish even more than you can dream. So with that said, you will need to choose and pick your friends wisely. There will be days when you feel like you are the only son struggling to secure a good future. These will be the times where the counsel of man will manifest itself for greater value. I say this because you will need a confidante to empty yourself into. Hopefully this would be someone who will be able to encourage and remind you of who you are, and that you are not alone. I will remind you that there will be days when you struggle to maintain your relationship with God. You may even doubt him, and go astray a bit...but know that the idea of sharing your thoughts can go a long way to dispel the struggle to resist sexual temptations and other frustrations. That one person that you want to talk to is God. Establish that personal relationship with him early on. It would be perfect timing, for sure! It is a wonderful thing to take everything to the Lord in prayer, and I encourage you to do so always. However, there are some practical problems that require practical solutions. Being able to relate to someone in whom you have confidence, someone that is willing and able to give guidance and proper counseling is an absolute blessing. Talking in itself is therapeutic. When you are able to relate, it allows someone to acknowledge your feelings to which you are entitled because you are unique. It is important with whom you choose to relate, so remember that God sticks closer than any brother! There's a lot to be said concerning how the first relationship manifested itself, and it's not far-fetched for us to reflect on a natural balance in reference to when God created his special son, Adam. Imagine the pride about his handy work as he stopped to admire him. I can imagine God saying, “Perfect!” But not before realizing something was amiss. “My son Adam is incomplete, lonely and sad. Who will he communicate with, laugh with, and share his inner thoughts and expressions with?” God immediately decided to make the necessary adjustments by taking a rib from Adam and created an exquisite woman - his other half! God cares about you having relationships with the opposite sex. But again I ask you to wait for your special mate.