HOW TO USE GOD'S LIFETIME WARRANTY IN YOUR MARRIAGE
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Dear Mary,
How are you making out? It has been a long time since we talked. How are you finding your studies? Senior high must be different from junior? At any rate, I believe you are going to make it. Continue to work hard as you always do.
Last time we talked, you told me that most of your friends are going out with boys, do you have anyone yet? I do not totally reject the idea of boy/girl friends at your age, but maturity is highly necessary, before one gets him/herself involved in a relationship. What do I mean by maturity? I am trying to say one must be ready, age wise, to be able to handle any situation that may arise during dating. “I broke up with him/her” is not uncommon with people of your age. One needs to know how to handle a breakup disappointment. I know many people of your age when their relationship broke up, they cried, which almost led to depression, because they felt rejected and abandoned. So you need to be matured emotionally, physically and spiritually.
You should also know that going out steadily with regard to a relationship is time consuming. You need a man in your life, but your education is supposed to be the #1 priority for you now. Cost of living is constantly increasing. Most of the couples nowadays need two jobs to make ends meet. High school education may not give one a good paying job. What I am trying to say is financial security should be considered before a serious relationship. Anything that will debar you from achieving your goal should be ignored or delayed as of now. You must know some female students who dropped out of school because of early pregnancy. It is true that many students are doing it -- have boy/girl friends in high school, but how many of them are be able to discipline themselves sexually?
Mary, I don’t want you to think that I am totally against dating at your age. If you know that you are matured enough emotionally and that education will be so important to you- that you will not be wasting your time on the phone,, texting, email etc. – it’s okay. I want the best for you, your family is proud of you, they need you, your community, province and country as well. Be smart in your decision. Don’t rush, wait for the right time. God has someone for you. The person God has for you will not pass you by. Do I need to say pray or pray more about your life, education, and ask God to give you a man that is meant for you? Do you mind, if I pray with you? Let’s pray.
Lord thank you for Mary. I pray that you will continue to bless her, to help her in her studies so that she will be the woman you want her to be. Help her not to be ashamed to be different. Give her the right man for her life at your time in Jesus name. Amen
God bless you Mary, keep in touch.
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About the Book
The idea to write fictional letters to marital couples on how to use God’s lifetime warranty in their marriages came into being in the process of a sermon preparation as a guest pastor for a local church in November 2011. I prayed about which message to deliver for many days. About two days before Sunday, I had a dream that a young lady participated during my sermon. After the service, her family thanked me and said I made her speak in public for the first time and I gave her the encouragement that she needs for the rest of her life. Then I woke up.
On the actual Sunday service, during the sermon, I asked the congregation how many of them had a dog or a cat. A young lady – a 17 year old said she had a cat. I asked if she ever took her cat for a walk, she said, “no.” I asked, “why not?” She replied, “Nobody does!” Then I said people take their dogs for walks, but this does not mean that dogs are more important or better than cats. Cats have their own usefulness. God who created us knows that we are not the same and that we cannot function in the same way. One should not be boasting that s/he is better than the other. After the service, the grandfather of the cat owner who spoke during my sermon and her aunt came to me and thanked me for the opportunity given to the young lady to talk for the first time in public, which would enable her to express herself publicly. When I was praying at home after the sermon, I had the feeling that God wanted me to tell people to try out what seems to be unusual for them.
It has been my concern for many years that many couples don’t take their wedding vows seriously. It is affecting children a great deal; many children have two or three stepparents. Those children without stepparents seem to be the odd ones among their peers. In Canada, about 50% of first marriages may likely end up in divorce. One may presume that the rate of divorce in second marriages would be lower, but instead it is higher at 72% while, third marriages have the highest divorce rate of 85% (Comparative Annual Divorce Rate in Canada). Similarly, in America, the first marriages divorce rate ranges from 41 – 50%; second marriages divorce rate is between 60-67% and third marriages is between 73-74%. (Information on Divorce Rate and Statistics).
This book is fictional. The stories are not real stories. They are about my past experiences with heterosexual couples in my counseling or pastoral care. I do not have a particular person or couple in mind. No names in the book are real names. If anybody’s name or any couples have the same names as used in the book, I would like them to know that I am not telling their particular story or using them as an example. The Holy Spirit inspired the writers of the bible stories/ vii instructions/messages and the same Holy Spirit is still talking to us today. I believe, I was inspired to write the book. I will encourage anyone or couple whose story or stories are similar to what’s in the book not to be too critical, but to take it (the book) as a means through which God is speaking to them to change. No marriage is too bad that God cannot change for better. Don’t fold your arms and accept your troubled marriage as a done deal. I will advise the readers to call upon the author of marriage, God, through Jesus Christ, to fix their marriages. He is able.
About the Author
Dr. Amos Adeniyi was an ordained minister with Methodist Church Nigeria before he came to Canada in 1987 for further studies at Acadia University in Wolfville, Nova Scotia, where he obtained his Master of Divinity and Master of Religious Christian Education. He also got his Post Graduate Diploma in Prison Ministry from Acadia Divinity College. By the special grace of God, Amos attended Trinity International University in Deerfield, Illinois, USA where his doctoral degree was conferred on him in 1999. He pastored churches for 17 years in Canada, and retired in 2012. During his ministry in Nigeria and Canada, he interacted with people of different ages, genders and cultures, and listened to their stories with compassion and care. Dr. Adeniyi provided helpful advice, as well as prayed for and prayed with people for divine interventions in their different situations. He started Abundant Life Counseling Center in 2011. He is a Canadian Certified Counsellor (CCC) and also a member of the American Association of Christian Counsellors (AACC). He resides in Fredericton, New Brunswick, Canada with his wife, Eunice (Yemi) and Paul, his last child. His grown -up children live out of the province.