If Two Trains Are Traveling in Opposite Directions . . . . I Don't Care What the Apples Cost

Many years ago... and I’m not going to say how many, but back when bee sting kits came equipped with an empty syringe and a vial I was trained to give injections along with the basic “life saving” techniques of first aid.   Diabetics might know about this.  My instructor handed me and the three others being trained  oranges.  She then said those memorable words, “It’s just like injecting a person.”  I wonder if the other three felt like chuckling as I did.  Injecting a piece of fruit seemed preposterous.  But we began nonetheless stabbing the defenseless orbs over and over.  One of my classmates remarked that if we did this right we would graduate to grapefruit.  

     Finally, the time came that we moved up to human beings.  And I can say with the utmost certainty that injecting an orange is most definitely not like injecting a person.

1) Oranges don’t whine.

2) Oranges don’t faint

3) Oranges don’t ask stupid questions when they see the hypodermic needle. Such as “What’s that thing for?”  (Hey, you stood in line for a tetanus shot.  You figure it out.)

4) You don’t have to chase an orange around the room... unless, of course, you drop it.

5) Oranges don’t complain.

6) Oranges don’t have to have their older brothers there to hold their hands.

7) Oranges don’t have to have their other brother call from Europe to find out how it went.

8) And oranges don’t kick you if it hurts.

It was recently brought to my attention that in this day and age people still learn to give injections using oranges.  In this day and age when they have a variety of what are known as "medical dummies" that oranges are still favored for this task.  The medical dummies are rather sophisticated nowadays and in many cases can be programmed to respond as would a real, live person.  That being the case they should really skip the fruit and give the student a real "true to life experience" by programming the the dummy to kick.