Surviving Motherhood

Before I start, let me give you an overall view of the three trimesters of pregnancy. Keep in mind that every pregnancy is different, even for the same woman. Some of you may feel more discomfort than others. To some, pregnancy will be an easy ride, a time of joy and excitement. To others, it will be a time of uncertainty, fear, and pain. It all depends on your state of mind, body, soul, and, of course-- genetics.

You wake up one morning and realize that you missed a period-- what do you do? See your physician. So you just got home from the doctor's office and he or she gave you the wonderful news that you are an expectant parent. It doesn't matter if it is your first or your fifth pregnancy, you will always have mixed emotions about it. You may feel thrilled at first, but there's always some sense of fear: "Will I be a good parent? Will he grow up to be a doctor or a drug dealer? Will she be a lawyer or a prostitute?" And finally: "Will I scream my lungs out during labor? Will I pass gas on my first PUSH!!???" As ridiculous as they may seem, these are all questions that come to you as soon as your head hits the pillow that first night after the news is given to you. You have to remember that you're not alone. You are probably an alien from outer space if you don't come up with these thoughts.

When you first find out you are pregnant, you may not believe that you are really carrying a fertilized egg inside of you. If you are further along, you may not believe you have a zygote or an embryo stuck to your uterus. Since the changes in your body don't occur immediately, it is difficult to truly realize what is going on until you first hear the baby's heartbeat at the doctor's office about 10 to 12 weeks after gestation. When the doctor puts a special microphone on your stomach (after smothering it with a heavy and greasy gel that leaves your skin sticky for hours), and you hear that galloping sound (your baby's heart beat), you will realize, for the first time, that you are a wild and barbarian animal!! Yes, a true mammal hatching its offspring, providing it with a warm and cozy place inside of you, inside YOUR body, living in there for nine months!!! I have to say, this is the most incredible feeling you will ever experience in your life. No matter how close anyone is to you, they will never be able to feel, truly sense, what is going on, unless that person is a mother herself. This feeling will stay with you throughout your pregnancy, and grow even stronger after the baby is born-- when you look at that "creature", at this "miniature person", measure "it" and realize that you had "it" crammed, packed and stuffed inside your body!! What an incredible feeling!!

So you just gave birth. The doctor tells you it's OK for you to take a stroll around the hospital's Maternity Floor (and pass "gas"). Slowly you get out of bed, you look around the room, still feeling a little disoriented, you smile-- You start taking small steps and slowly, very slowly, walk out to the corridor. Telephones are ringing, nurses are running up and down, doctors are taking notes. You look to the left and you see the Nursery. You walk over there-- ever so gently-- smiling and imagining your baby's little hands, fingers, feet, toes-- a tear drop slowly runs down your right cheek-- You get close to the window, you can actually hear the babies crying in there, when suddenly, from the corner of your left eye you see-- a SCALE!!!! TEMPTATION!!! "What should I do?? See my baby or WEIGH MYSELF!!!?? So you stop, and you think: "Well-- the baby weighed 6.9 pounds, the placenta is gone, a lot of blood and water came out-- hum--. I must have lost AT LEAST 25 pounds!!! How exciting!!" And you do what you should NEVER do 6 hours after you give birth!!!! YOU WEIGH YOURSELF!!! NO!! Don't do it!! Never, EVER!! It takes a couple of weeks for you to get rid of some of that fat, water and blood you have been retaining for 9 months--