Short Stories

"I will be working closely with the great surgeon, Dr. Anubis Sarcophagus . . . I’m a Doctor of Theology."

"Where are the rest of the people who are supposed to be here to observe and listen to your seminar?" I asked worriedly.

Dr. Usterwas very considerately placed a calming hand on my shoulder. "They have already experienced immortality," he said. "Yarrah, now you are the audience."

"I thought we were both ‘audience’ when we were in the cab."

"Dr. Anubis Sarcophagus sent me out to bring you here. There is nothing you should be concerned about."

"I’m damned well concerned about immortality, and what the hell has a surgeon to do with it?" I yelled.

"Surgery on the body is always minor; surgery on the soul is always major," Dr. Sagamore Usterwas reminded me. "We have learned from our medical and theological mistakes--and tonight we are prepared for full success in melding both sciences together. I will do my best to see that you experience immortality."

"I’d like to believe what you say, but how could you and he expect anyone to believe, when both of you could die of the same malady as everyone else--shortness of breath. And neither of you has ever mentioned such a rare accomplishment."

Dr. Usterwas stared at my chest exactly as he had done during the cab ride. "All breath is the essence of the soul, as Dr. Sarcophagus and I shall gladly prove to disbelievers," he said softly. I then found myself being forcefully led to a cloth-shrouded table, above which glowed a bright lamp from the center of what appeared to be a gigantic ceiling fan more appropriate to a Florida courthouse in July.

I had been tricked by Dr. Usterwas and my presence before him and Dr. Sarcophagus suddenly seemed outrageous and bizarre. That fan was like a giant spider that had pounced upon me, and something within it pressed heavily, wrenching at my innards. I was unable to flee from the macabre surroundings. Wishing to be quickly done with the whole matter, I screamed, "Let’s get on with this thing called ‘immortality’!"