Soft Power Skills, Women and Negotiations
by
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| Negotiation Is: |
"Negotiation calls for the handling of situations with as few self structured barriers as possible."
"It is reason and emotion, head and heart; it is a successful blend between the heart and the mind."
"We become successful at negotiation, if we attempt to grasp the whole rather than become engrossed in detail."
"We use and make every mistake we can to gain wisdom, negotiation is a learning process."
"Life is an ever changing process. We can't expect the same results from the same actions all the time. It is trial and error."
"It is a method to arrive at a solution, where the answer does not come from within us, nor from outside of us. It is both."
"Negotiation is both an art and a game to be enjoyed, for all situations, circumstances, or people can change in an instant."
I agree with all of the above definitions. However, I find the latter definition allows for divine intervention. Sometimes when things are not going as we had hoped or planned, and we have done all we know to do, we have to let go of our human will. When we let go, we call upon a higher power to take over. Then we need to affirm or pray for divine justice and right action for all parties. Negotiation is so much a part of our daily lives that we interact/negotiate without thinking about it and set up win/lose experiences rather than win/win. The basis of all negotiation is communication, human interaction, and relationship building. The negotiation process, like people is elusive and intriguing. Just when you think you have things under control, the players, circumstances, and events shift. Successful negotiation is the art of arriving at an agreement, that please both you and the other person. It requires you understand your actions, and reactions to respond appropriately to the reaction of others.
I will be interchanging the word human interaction with the word negotiation through out the book. Everything we do involves negotiation. We continually trade or make concessions in life to have the things that give us pleasure or add meaning.
Negotiation occurs any time we attempt to influence the behavior of another person, to cause them to comply with our wishes and desires. It implies that a desire demands satisfaction or a need is unfulfilled. It involves the modification of a relationship through human interaction to reach an agreement. Negotiation takes place whenever one person wants or needs something and the other person fulfills the need.
We negotiate for many reasons. Some of them are listed below.
WHY WE NEGOTIATE
- A need is unmet.
- A desire is unfulfilled.
- A difference of opinion exists.
- The issue or item is negotiable—things, positions and situation can be negotiated, not feelings.
- One or both parties is seeking to influence or change behavior through compromise.
Maslow has listed seven categories of needs as basic motivators of human behavior in a successive, hierarchical pattern they are:
- Physiological needs (homeostatic—hunger, sex, warmth)
- Safety and security needs, (job security, money in bank, home dwelling)
- Love and belonging needs
- Esteem needs (reputation, prestige, status, domination and the approval) of others
- Need for self-actualization (to become what one is capable of becoming)
- Need to know and to understand
- Esthetics needs (order, balance, beauty)
According to Maslow, the satisfaction of our needs motivate everything we do. Since none of our needs are 100% satisfied, we are continually driven to satisfy them. If Maslow's theory is true, we may be unaware of our innate tendency to put our concerns before that of others.
Which of the above needs do you feel would be a factor in your negotiation/interactional deliberations?
Why is this need important in your life at this time?
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Book Details
About the Book
This book will serve as an overview on negotiation for some people and a review for others. It provide concise, nuts and bolts information for the novice negotiator, so that you understand what occurs when you or others negotiate. Much of this information will address the negotiation process and the skills you need to develop to be a good negotiator. Soft Power Negotiation SkillsTM goes beyond knowledge of theoretical negotiation concepts about how to negotiate. It looks at power and the way it is perceived and used in our society.
The negotiation process is an art form that intertwines your ego and personality style. It requires you to have knowledge about human motivation, and an intuitive awareness about your fears, passions, strengths and weaknesses. To become a skilled negotiator, it requires that you have the ability to look beyond the words you or others use, to find the hidden meaning of what is said. It is possible to find yourself or others - overreacting, under reacting, or reacting as if on automatic pilot, to a neutral word, or statement made by the opposing party. You will need to be patient with yourself and the other party and practice tolerance. For all new learning takes times to develop and that the learning curve is not a down stroll. The curve of learning has an upward peak, down ward peak, and many flat plateaus, when no new learning is occurring.
I encourage you to take the risks required to gain the wisdom and knowledge to negotiate softly. The negotiation process is a continuous learning experience. It requires you understand your actions and reactions, to help you better understand the behavior of others. You will find the book informative with simple steps to follow.
About the Author
We all have an Ignitable fire within us! Dr. Ida Greene help you light it and keep it ablaze. Dr. Greene's philosophy is simple: "If it can be done, I can do it!" Dr. Greene contends, that whatever your mind can CONCEIVE and you truly BELIEVE, you can and will ACHIEVE. She holds a Ph.D. is a Registered Nurse, Hypnotherapist, Licensed Marriage and Family, Child Therapist, Educator and Motivational Speaker. She also is the author of nine books: Light the Fire Within You, Are You Ready for Success?, Soft Power Negotiation Skills, How to Be A Success In Business, Self-Esteem, the Essence of You, How to Improve Self- Esteem In The African American Child, How to Improve Self- Esteem In Any Child, Money: How to Get It, How to Keep It, and Say Goodbye to Your Smallness, Hello to Your Greatness.
Ida can show you, how to use Soft Power Negotiating Skills, to add zest to any relationship. Everyone can use Soft Power Negotiation principles to create instant rapport with others, to improve their communication skills. Everyone wants to be a success.