On a cold November Saturday in Muskogee, Oklahoma sat Melissa in the shopping mail alone to wrestle with her problem. Her problem happened to her when she was a little girl. Although 14 years old and one of the more popular girls in he school, she had never mentioned it to anyone when it occurred. As she grew older, she tried to forget about it . She was thinking about it less and less these days. However, at times the terrible memories come to her in dreams and nightmares. Melissa could not understand what the dreams were nor could she understand what they were about.
While Melissa was deep in thought, Teresa walked by and noticed her sitting motionless and staring aimlessly into space. "A penny for your thoughts" said Teresa.
"Huh!" responded Melissa.
"Why are you sitting here alone and just staring into space?"
"I am resting." Said Melissa. "I need to be alone to think but thanks for asking."
"Oh" said Teresa and she left.
A little later another classmate whose name was Francine came by. "What are you doing here, Melissa?"
"I’m thinking" said Melissa.
"What are you thinking about?" asked Francine.
"I don’t know" said Melissa. "I can’t remember! But I’m alright!"
""Oh" said Francine and she went away.
Melissa stayed sitting on the mall’s bench for some time. Finally, Shelly came by. She asked: "Hey, Missy! What’s up! And why are you just sittin’ there and not enjoyin’ this day. I’ve come by three times in the last two hours and you haven’t moved a muscle. You are just sittin’ there staring into space. Something up! Are you sick, bored! Hey, girl are you on--"
"Nah, I’m not on any drugs Shelly. I’m looking for freedom."
"Freedom from what? What are you talkin’ about?"
"Shelly, I have a problem and I wanna be free of it!"
"What is this IT Missy that you’re talkin’ about?"
"I can’t say" responded Melissa.
"Is it won’t say?" responded Shelly.
Melissa sat on the bench and began to sob.
"I can’t! I can’t! in a low voice.
At that moment, Shelly’s face and clothes turned so bright that Melissa was nearly blinded.
"What’s happening? Don’t hurt me! Please, don’t hurt me!"
"Melissa, I won’t hurt you! I’m here to help you! I’ve been sent by God to help you. I’m an angel!"
"WHAT! I don’t believe in God! Why should I? He let my father and his friends hurt me! I hate God!"
God understands your pain, Melissa!"
"Yeah, right! So why didn’t he stop my father and his friends? Why! Why! Why!" as she fought her tears and shaking uncontrollably.
"God did not wish the evil things that happened to you to have occurred. The evil came from your father and his friends. God cannot, by His own nature, just control humankind whom He gave free will. If He did, then he would violate His own goodness."
"I don’t understand!"
"But God loves you! I’m here to help you . You need to tell your mom and get help Melissa."
"I can’t! I just can’t! Besides she’s not my real mom! I’m just adopted."
"Melissa, I know that. But even though you are adopted, your adopted mother loves you and you need help! If you do not get help, you will get worse!"
"But I can’t! Don’t you hear me!"
"Melissa, you must believe that God knows what He is doing and trust that there are many, many good people in the world. Your adopted mother and father love you so much. They will support you and give you the help you need. Right now, you are ashamed of something you were not at fault for! You were just, 5, 6, and 7 years old when these things happened to you. God wants you to get through this because He has something special for you to do."
"I hate God!"