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We are no longer who we are, but who they expect us to be. Many strangers who learn of our occupation will treat us differently and are compelled to blurt out their legal problems in hopes our responses will make them vanish. Others may acknowledge how tough our job is, claiming they wouldn’t do it for a million dollars, but when these "empathetic" people are told that their taxes are going up one dollar to pay for the police to get better equipment or a higher salary, they will scream to the heavens. Some may just rattle off the names of thirty-four police officers, not knowing we wouldn’t trust anyone who knew that many cops. Merchants may offer a discount on food and small items, and of course, there is the free cup of coffee. Children wearing wide grins or petrified faces will ask us if we ever shot anybody or caught any murderers. The elderly will smile meekly and nod, or they may scold us for allowing their neighbor’s dog to bark all night. People don’t react this way when they first encounter a secretary or a plumber. It must be the uniform, the gun, or the badge they see that mesmerizes them. They certainly don’t see a human being. Only other cops will see beyond the uniform, and carry on a normal conversation. It may be just a simple, "how’s everything going?" but it will be sincere
There will come a time when we swallow the indigestible fact that there are many people who hate us, simply because we are cops. We first assumed that all citizens supported us because we are the good guys who are out there to get the bad guys, who are out there to get them. When we realize that it isn’t so, it is easy to adopt an attitude that some of these jerks are not worth our time. However, this unhealthy outlook can grow to a point where we don’t invest our time or caring in anybody.
Old friends begin to fade from our lives. A few will avoid our company because their foolish drug use is more important. They are wise enough to understand the problems that can arise for all concerned. We intentionally avoid those who are not as wise, and who fail to take our position seriously. "You a cop?" they’d smirk, "Why, I can remember when you blah, blah, blah." In their eyes we remain the imperfect beings that we are, instead of the pure, law-enforcing machine everyone expects us to be.
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Officers with swollen heads of power will find it difficult to walk in another man’s shoes, be diplomatic, or even admit that they can make a mistake. Eventually, the hands of reality will grab them by the throat and drag them down from the pedestal they have built for themselves. Unfortunately, the few who resist changing their bad posture would probably display such behavior wherever they were employed.
I will direct your attention to the average cop who has chased a dream to achieve an honorable goal to do his best to help people in need.
It takes years of exposure to the elements of police work to be infected by the "attitude". Throughout their lengthy career cops are repeatedly slapped with unfulfilled expectations and witness, first hand, the parade of injustices that take place on the street, within their department and the clogged court system. When those factors are mixed with public scrutiny, a self-serving media, politics and the criminal element, it can mushroom into an environment that is emotionally unsafe. These influences mold the pliable disposition of a cop. Once the affects solidify within the hearts and minds of police officers it is very difficult to treat. What may be exhibited to friends, family and the public are only the symptoms, and the tip of a disabling iceberg.
Nobody wants a "sick" cop to work the streets, especially police officers that must work closely by his/her side. However, there is not a concerted effort to find a cure. A sympathetic ear, a voice of support or a simple "well done" may be all that it is needed to boost a depleted spirit. This, however, is not done within the kingdom of macho cops.
Where is the concerned person or organization with the power and the balls to do something FOR a police officer, instead of, TO a police officer? Discuss the matter with our appointed stress officers? Cops don’t go to cops for help simply because cops can’t be trusted with confidential information about other cops. They gossip! I will concede that stress officers may be able to relate to your job-related predicament, but they can also use their experience and knowledge to measure and compare your ability and inability to cope. No officer would welcome another to judge his stability, for this too, is not the macho thing to do.