1991
Vukovar, Croatia
It was the first Wednesday in
November. The day seemed like any other. More wounded people were brought into
the hospital. Since there were no painkillers left, all amputations and
surgeries had to be performed without the anesthetics. Heavy screams of the
suffering that echoed through the hospital weakened the sound of detonations
and shelling.
Some time around noon, a soldier with a badly wounded leg was
brought into the operation room. His leg was to be amputated. Martina and a few
other nurses held the man’s bouncing body during the procedure. When it ended,
the man, still screaming from pain, was taken to another room. With a deep
sorrow in her eyes, Martina watched him being pushed away on the movable
hospital bed, allowing herself to breathe. She sat down on the chair in the
corner of the room and covered her face with her shaking hands. Tears erupted
from her insides, flooding her tired face. She doubted her own strength.
A few moments later came another
emergency. My break is over, she thought and ordered
herself to get up. Another war story was about to take place and settle
permanently into her consciousness.
The next in line was a soldier
whose uniform was drenched in blood. She froze when she saw the soldier’s face,
immediately recognizing his hair, his wrinkled hands, and the grimness in his
eyes.
The man laying
on the portable hospital bed was soaking in his own warm blood. His eyes were
open and gazing at the ceiling. His body was shaking. Drops of sweat came down
his face; his skin as pale as death.
She grabbed his hand, whispering:
“Dear... It’s me, Martina. Do you hear me?”
She called his name, but heard no
response. He continued to stare at the ceiling with the same remoteness.
“Do you recognize me?” she
repeated desperately. “Please, look at me.”
His eyeballs moved slowly. His
lip stretched into a barely noticeable smile.
A team of doctors marched into
the room and started preparing for the surgery. By the reaction on their
worried faces, Martina could see that his injuries were serious. It seemed as
if his life was hanging on a piece of an invisible rope and her hope was
hanging with it.
“Hang in there, please. Don’t
leave me,” Martina begged, holding his hand.
She heard no reply. No reaction. Just a weak squeeze of his hand that gave her enough strength to
remain standing on her feet.
In the next moment, he fell into
a coma.