TONGUE TIED? SPEAKING FOR FRAIDY CATS!

What’s shakin’?  Probably you...if you are preparing to speak before a group...for any reason.

It has been said that, for some people, the fear of speaking before an audience exceeds the fear of falling, the fear of heights, the fear of alienation and, in some cases, the fear of death.   The fear of death!

Even so, every year an army of amateur speakers will, for the first time, take to podiums or lecterns to facilitate discussions, conduct meetings, seminars or other instructional classes or take part in other informational or training programs.

If you happen to be one of these people, how can you learn to handle public speaking responsibilities in a professional manner?  I have some suggestions for you.

FIRST:  Demand a podium capable of supporting a dead body...yours.  Then throw yourself over it making sure to hook your arm around the microphone so that you don’t slip away!

SECOND:   Adhere to the old wife’s tale, feed a cold crowd and starve a speaker.  This cuts down on throwing up!

THIRD:  Insist on a seat near a restroom.  For some unexplained reason, speakers often have overactive kidneys.

FOURTH: Never read a speech.  Prepare your remarks on note cards.  These can serve a dual purpose.  You can rearrange them as you analyze your audience and, in the event the person who introduces you preempts the jokes on your first few cards, you can use the sharp edges to slit your wrists!

(I’ll always remember my first experience at a lectern.  I was scheduled to speak at my daughter’s Catholic school.  I was cool and calm.  When called upon, I casually poked myself in the eye with a red marking pencil, strode boldly forward, revealing that the back of my dress was plastered to my profusely sweating body and tried to open my mouth only to discover that it had dried up and my lips were frozen.

Nevertheless, I cleared my throat, folded my arms across my chest and, completely forgetting my prepared message, asked, “Do you nuns really shave your heads?”)

OK, I admit this never really happened, but it could have.  My first real experience at a lectern was before the New Jersey State Assembly, where I spoke as a member of Cleveland Amory’s Fund for Animals against the inhumane steel-jawed, leg-hold animal traps.  My presentation was flawless, but I was shaking so hard that Mr. Amory had to tear my fingers from around the microphone stem and lead me back to my seat.  I was sure I was going to faint.

That experience caused me to ponder: Why do we fear public speaking?

WHAT EXACTLY DO WE FEAR?

Is our fear of the audience physical?  Surely, they won’t rise up and hurt us.

Are we afraid of ridicule?  Do we fear making fools of ourselves?

Do we fear that we have nothing of value to say?  That we will bore our listeners?

Many of our leading entertainers...actors, singers and comedians confess to being shy and introverted.

Why, then, do they succeed in such high profile professions?

Very simply, they succeed because they are able to hide. They can hide behind characters, musical renditions or comedy routines.

Thus they can say, in effect, “You do not see me.  If you choose to reject me, you are rejecting the character I am portraying, not the person behind the character, the song or the joke.”  This is how they protect their egos.

Speakers, on the other hand, have no façade to hide behind.  We stand or fall by our words.

Nevertheless, in one-way or another, most of us don an armor to protect our fragile egos in our day-to-day contact with others.  We all fear rejection!

Wouldn’t it be better if we simply overcame our fears?

“That’s easier said than done,” is what I’m sure you’re thinking.

It really is simpler than you may think, however.

A major antidote to fear is confidence!  And confidence can be gained through knowledge.