Nick

William started to cry and she held him close, but did as Nick asked. Nick backed out onto the landing and slammed the door shut. He told Tanya he had locked all the doors and windows and had a knife in his hand, which he would use if she tried to get out of the room.

William and Tanya had nothing to eat or drink that afternoon. They just sat and kept each other company until Tanya plucked up the courage to go and listen at the door. Hearing nothing, she stretched out her hand to reach for the handle and slowly opened the door. It seemed to creak louder today. Nick looked up and they faced each other.

Nick’s face was red and bulging with anger. He hurled the knife in her direction and it stuck in the door as she quickly pushed it shut.

'I said stay in there!' he shouted angrily.

'But William is starving!' cried Tanya.

'I said shut up.'

Another two hours went by and Tanya desperately needed the toilet. William still hadn’t had any milk and his crying was breaking her heart. She had no idea what she was going to do. She tried reasoning with Nick again.

‘Please Nick – William needs his milk!’

There was no reply.

Scared, Tanya got up and banged on the door.

'Why are you doing this?'

'I am dying and I don’t care any more,' Nick replied.

'You need help Nick. We can sort this out. Please let me out, we can talk about it.'

'Tan, shut up and shut William up too, I can’t cope with all this noise. I’ve been to a psychologist, but he’s useless. He’s trying to twist my mind – I just want to die.'

There was silence.

'I love you, Nick. We can work things out, we have William and we both need you, please let us out and when I’ve fed William I’ll put him to bed and we can talk.'

Nick opened the door.

Trembling Tanya walked towards the door with William in her arms. Nick was in tears and sweating profusely. Tanya looked at him and realised he had had a seizure and needed help. She hugged him.

'Come downstairs with us. I’ll get you a sandwich.'

Nick followed them downstairs and sat in the lounge and waited for Tanya to make him a sandwich and get William’s milk ready. When she brought the food into the room, Nick had his head in his hands.

'It’s not that bad,’ she said, ‘we can work through this.' .

Nick ate his sandwich whilst Tanya fed and changed William. As if in a dream, she got him ready for bed and settled him down for the night, wondering all the time when Nick might snap again.

Downstairs, Nick was in the same position – sitting on the sofa with his head in his hands..

'You need help, Nick, and I can’t help you. You need to keep seeing your doctor and you need to tell him how you really feel. If we’re going to work through this, you need to be honest. Let me call him now,' she demanded.

Nick agreed as he cried into his hands.

Tanya called the doctor, who came as soon as he could and examined Nick.

‘He’s mentally unstable and needs help,’ said the doctor in a serious voice. They were standing in the hall while Nick lay on the sofa.

‘So what’s next?’ asked Tanya.

‘Leave it with me,’ said the doctor. Tanya closed the door behind him and stood there for a while, leaning her head against the wood and trying not to cry.