You are successful in love when love finds you and brings you joy. You, however, may miss the beckoning of true love if your quest is premised on synthetic and cosmetic values. A successful relationship becomes tenuous if it rests on artificial and material standards. A successful relationship lies in the self-contained manifestation of love, happiness, and contentment. While material acquisitions have an enormous capacity to oil the wheels of luxury and comfort, they do not by themselves create or sustain love. A loving relationship is a state of joy. An unhappy relationship is a state of deprivation, a redundant encounter with misery, an impoverished life indeed.
Our call in this book is for discerned action on your part. There is no reason for you to sit stagnant, illusively waiting for the elusive Mr. Right. In the same stretch it is unnecessary that you remain in a miserable relationship with a loveless man, with the hope that he ultimately will “change” and assume the dream image you have configured for him. It is unlikely that an adult personality readily will change to meet your principled expectations, more so if such expectations are unreasonable. You set yourself up for failure when you erect illusionary towers and symbols of love as to the one and only man you want and hope to meet, to the exclusion of all others. False signals fetch false responses and unintended results. You possibly have been sending or receiving false signals, attracting the wrong men and interacting with then in inharmonious mismatches.
This book deals in fair detail with romantic expectations and their brassbound counterweights. A woman erects sure-fire grounds for disappointments and emotional failure when she sets up unyielding attributes that a man first must meet before she can let herself warm up to love’s silent beacon. We examine various personality types, and the thwarting barriers some women set up against their own objectives. By the standards you set, you inadvertently invite pretenders and glib actors who capably and slickly would slip through your defenses to your emotional field. Some men have the glib flair and faculty to pierce a woman’s demonstrative defenses, but soon after they score the goal they depart, leaving her with heartbreak for keepsakes and remembrances.
The book will help you to understand and avoid unreasoned misperceptions and pitfalls in dating, courtship, and romantic relationships. Human expectations hardly are in a singular frame and it is unlikely that any one man will possess all the ideal attributes and qualifications you desire. Your “ideal man” may not even exist or may be unavailable now and at any other time, for whatever reasons. You cannot, of course, wait a lifetime for a Mr. Right who, if he ever existed and showed up, would rank you as a Ms. Wrong, leaving your emotion cracked at a high and dried point. To be sure, a common cause of emotional hurt and heartbreak for many a woman is when the woman feels she has found Mr. Right and acts on the feeling, but Mr. Right is convinced that the woman is not good enough for him and hurtfully demonstrates his dissatisfaction.
If you sincerely trust that you are good enough for a good man, you certainly will find and keep the fitting man, a man who without persuasion will recognize and embrace your goodness. Have faith in your inner beauty and it will radiate outwardly to all those that cross your path. The suitable man will show up, caught in the breezy radiance of your inner beauty. Your watchful role is to recognize him when he shows up at your doorstep bearing the gift of love. For now, open your heart and have it in flexible readiness. Alter and spaciously adjust your mind’s scope to the fullness and abundance of love all around you.