The Curtains Ate My Grandma
by
Book Cover & Preview Text
The curtains ate my grandma,
One bright, sunny afternoon.
I hope they didn't like her
And they'll spit her back out soon.
They snuck right up behind her,
She did not know they were there.
She had the vacuum cleaner on
So she was unaware,
The curtains flying in the breeze
Weren't blowing in the wind -
They were really sneaking up on her...
And then they sucked her in.
Oh, I miss my poor old grandma.
She never did us harm.
She didn't need those evil things
To grab her by the arm.
But learn from this all readers,
Ages three to ninety-two:
Get blinds on all your windows
Or it's curtains time for you!
Formats
Book Details
About the Book
Told through the eyes of a child, this colourful collection of rhyming stories uses eccentric characters to depict the difficulties of growing up. For some, there’s trouble with bullying in the schoolyard and the daunting prospect of trying new things. For others, there are bizarre acts of rebellion and the hilarious mishaps that follow untruths told by mischievous parents. From hitchhiking aliens and misbehaving pets to misguided adventures in hot air balloons, there really is a poem for every occasion. Suitable for children ages 3-92.
About the Author
Rebecca Faulks divides her time between writing silly poems and studying at the Royal Veterinary College in London, where she is neither training to be a poet nor a vet. During her time off, she returns home to Bermuda to visit her family, friends and ten cats. Understandably, many of the poems in The Curtains Ate My Grandma are loosely based upon her own bizarre experiences growing up. In the cases of carnivorous curtains and hitchhiking aliens, we’re talking very loosely.