The Amish Catapult
A tale of love and adventure
by
Book Cover & Preview Text
Chapter 1
It was a Thursday.
I remember that much.
I also remember how much I hate books written in the first person, as they seem quite pretentious.
Chapter 2
It was a Thursday.
John remembered that much.
Everything else was a little fuzzy in his memory, likely due to the concussion he was about sustain.
He also remembered how much he hated pretentious people.
And Gypsies.
And now here he was, surrounded by them.
Gypsies, not pretentious people.
Luckily Jesus, one of his closest friends, was close by his side was always willing to lend a helping hand in a situation like this. Jesus was also Johns’ cohort in most of his weekly escapades so John thought today would certainly be no different than any other normal outing. John whirled about quickly to acknowledge Jesus and observed that Jesus was not where he should have been.
It should be noted that the Jesus mentioned in this circumstance is not to be confused with the Jesus of the Bible, the one that is considered the religious Son of God, as the aforementioned Jesus is not related to God even in the slightest, but instead is a shorter Cuban gentleman with a curious penchant for Fresca. Nor is this the Baptist John of those same religious texts, if that matters at all in this context.
John turned back to the oncoming Gypsies and readied himself for what was possibly going to be the fight of his life, more so than even the badgers that he had defeated as they invaded his home in the spring of 2007, but that is a story for another time, possibly chapter 12 or 13. Luckily, John and Jesus had completed a Kung Fu marathon that Tuesday and he felt that he was prepared for any turmoil. As he backed up, twirling his horse hoof faster and faster, ready to defend against the heavily armed Gypsy battalion. He didn’t mind the stabbing, but the curses that often follow were his biggest Gypsy related fear.
Formats
Book Details
About the Book
The sparrow alit on the monastery wall, basking in the early morning sun. He shook the sleep from his eyes ruffled his feathers to feel the soft breeze that calmly snuck in from the east, and cocked his head, watching the monks in the spacious courtyard below.
The monks walked briskly out into the training area, and lined up along the wall, as if they had partaken in this exact same routine for several years. They had. As the master of the school gazed over his students, he smiled to himself. He was proud of all of them, and more so how they had handled the conflicts of the last week. Sure some of them were sore, some injured, bruised and bandaged, but they had fought as if their lives depended on it. And they had.
But unfortunately this is not their story; this is the story of John and Jesus, two unlucky guys on an adventure in the middle of the week.
About the Author
John DeGraffenried has been writing for many years, but has just recently learned how to use a computer, which is odd considering he grew up in a technical environment and has been supporting computer systems for the last 10 years.
John has been compared to a young Douglas Adams, but only by his mother, who has no actual knowledge of the author, but was instead referring to a painter who lives down the street. She has always been impressed by John's painting skills.