Patient in Affliction
Tips, tears and laughter for the in-home family caregiver of a dying parent
by
Book Cover & Preview Text
Foreword This is a much-needed book! It should be a best-seller because it's so practical and personal. People are living longer today and many of us are faced with being caregivers. This is a love story about patience and endurance. It's a book that allows the reader to honestly see both success and failure. Debbye Butler pours out her heart in telling the story of caring for her dying mother. This is such a transparent look at caregiving that you can't help but be impressed and touched by her journey. It's refreshing to see someone being honest about having your life, your home, and your privacy turned upside-down. It's a story of great faith tested in doing simple, but much too personal tasks for someone you know and love. This book should be read before you need to care for a loved one. It should be read by everyone, so we can show sympathy and provide much-needed support and help for those who are caregivers now. Having known Debbye for many years, I can tell you that this is an honest, practical account of her journey in caring for her mother. Debbye's faith, patience and her struggles are seen in each segment of this difficult chapter of her life. You can see her heart in this, as well as over a hundred practical “Pearls of Wisdom.” Read this book in a quiet place and take time to reflect on this deeply personal, yet very helpful story. Keep this book handy! We will all need it or know someone who does. I am thankful after having read it, that I have grown in my appreciation for all who care for others.
Shan Rutherford, Senior Pastor Greenwood Christian Church Greenwood, Indiana
Contents Section One: A time to weep One: Reluctant roommates Two: Licensed to drive me crazy Three: We've got mail! Four: Who are you, and where is my daughter? Five: Taking care of (your own) business Six: Caution: This role may cause drowsiness Seven: Just desserts Eight: DNR isn't Dept. of Natural Resources! Nine: Sticky fingers Ten: Dress for success Eleven: Dirty laundry Section Two: A time to laugh Twelve: Downey-soft teeth Thirteen: All creatures great and small Section Three: A time to mourn Fourteen: Preparing for goodbye Fifteen: It's over. Now what? Section Four: A time to dance Sixteen: Blessings in disguise Seventeen: A new beginning Section Five: Reflections & Revelations R&R One: Mistakes and best practices R&R Two: Bonus pearls of wisdom R&R Three: In loving memory R&R Four: Finding resources
Formats
Book Details
About the Book
Sometime in our lives, most of us will help an aging, frail, or chronically or terminally ill person do the most basic, personal tasks of daily living. We need to be empowered with knowledge, strength, courage and compassion in order to be the best possible in-home family caregiver.
Enter Patient in Affliction, something like a S.W.A.T. team on paper. This handbook drills down to the heart of the matter: Practical tips to help with the day-to-day activities and cope with roller-coaster emotions, both for the family caregiver (to preserve his or her strength and sanity) and the patient (to preserve his or her dignity).
Patient in Affliction is a unique, informative tool for family caregivers. As you read the pages, you'll be enlightened, encouraged, entertained and equipped. You'll feel like you're in the same room with the author, sharing a box of tissue or perhaps a cup of coffee as you navigate your family-caregiver role. You'll laugh and you'll cry as you read anecdotes from the author, who infuses her storytelling with light humor about a very serious topic. By the time you read the last sentence, you will realize that whatever you go through, whatever emotions you experience, you are not the first or only person to feel what you are feeling. You are absolutely not alone. Somebody understands.
Patient in Affliction is also encouragement for the encourager. Perhaps you are a friend of someone serving as family caregiver. This book raises your understanding about what a family caregiver goes through, and why your support is essential. Patient in Affliction is a great springboard to use as you extend your hand of compassion to a family caregiver.
About the Author
After 26 years as a corporate communications department editor and writer, Debbye Butler traded her company cubicle for a home office in 2002. Two and a half years later, she walked the emotionally and physically demanding journey as family caregiver for her beloved mother, who was diagnosed with inoperable lung cancer. Debbye moved her mother in with her and served as in-home family caregiver of a dying adult, a role that thousands of people across the U.S. fill every year.
Patient in Affliction is a handbook of practical, day-to-day tips for people who step into such a role. Debbye, whose writing is infused with light humor, also shares poignant anecdotes from her experience — moments of laughter, tears, and stress — with the intent to let family caregivers know they are not alone. Patient in Affliction is designed to enlighten, entertain, encourage and equip current and future family caregivers.
Debbye writes frequently for Web-based corporate publications and a local general-interest periodical; proofreads and copy-edits for an international book publisher; and has been a correspondent for the Indianapolis Star and other newspapers. Earlier career credits include creative nonfiction manuscripts in Indianapolis and Indianapolis Woman magazines and Allison Gappa Bottke's God Allows U-Turns book series published by Promise Press (a division of Barbour Publishing). In the 1980s, Debbye’s prose appeared in Blue Mountain Arts, Inc.’s greeting cards, calendars and books. She served as editor/writer of the official newsletter for the International Olympic Committee, athletes, and volunteers of the 1987 Pan American Games, staged in Indianapolis.
She graduated with distinction from Indiana University (IUPUI campus), having earned her B.A. in English, and has won numerous writing awards. Debbye is a long-time member of Greenwood Christian Church, Greenwood, Ind.