Virginia Black

August 18, 2010 The cold of the kitchen floor stung her face but she was too weak to get up. She lay there, still, unmoving, waiting for another blow. Thick, silent tears mixed with blood and formed a thin stream of red, and as she willed herself not to move, Kari watched the tiny crimson river dissipate into the aged cracks of the linoleum. Before another moment passed, she heard the heavy sigh behind her. He would apologize now. He would blame her, and without a moment of hesitation, Kari would take it. She would take anything for peace. “Damn it Kari, why do you make me so angry? I love you baby.” Michael leaned down and grabbed her shoulder. Out of instinct, she flinched, churning his rage once again. With a fiery kick, Michael planted his size-13 work boot into Kari’s stomach. She gasped with the impact, and before she could respond, he was walking away. Kari let her body relax as he left. The pain came with every heavy step as he stormed to the front door, but it was a welcome pain. She would be safe at least for the next twelve hours. The door slammed and she screeched out one strangled cry, and the tears came, not in silence but in agonizing sobs. It was less than five minutes later when the phone rang. Still weeping in a pool of blood and tears, Kari dragged her broken body to the phone and picked up the receiver. “I know you are sorry, Kar-bear, but listen, baby. I need you, and you know what that means. That means you will be home when my shift ends…. Right, baby.” Michael held his breath and waited impatiently for her response. He hadn‘t asked it, but softly demanded it from her. Even though Michael said it without question, Kari felt obligated to respond. It was a whisper of a word, but she managed a weak “yes” before the line went dead. It was her promise to him that she would stay, and Kari Brown never broke her promise. She wasn’t strong enough. Without returning the phone to the receiver, she laid it on the counter and made her way to the shower. The kids would wake up soon. It was time to put on a happy face. “Mom! Mom! Henry won’t give me my shoe!” Abby’s voice was loud and shrill and Kari was sure the neighbors next door could hear her cry for help as well. “Henry, give your sister her shoe. You two are going to be late for school, and I don’t have time for you two arguing - not this morning.” Kari meticulously rubbed foundation over the thick black crescent below her left eye. She had managed to cover most of it before Henry popped his head into her bathroom. It startled her, and Kari jumped and let out a quick squeal before she could stop herself. “Geez mom, I didn’t mean to scare you.” Henry tilted his head in confusion as Kari lifted a shaking hand instinctively to cover her bruised eye. “What’s wrong with your face, mom?” He was standing next to her in a moment. “Nothing. It’s nothing, baby. Give Abby her shoe so we can leave on time.” She bent down away from her child, pretending to find something under the sink, but Henry stayed where he was. “Henry! I said give your sister her shoe. Now go!” Her voice was shaky but the bellow in it let Henry know to retreat and make peace. He bowed, turned and headed back down the hallway. She had hurt his feelings. In a vain effort to hide her own pitiful pain, she had bruised the protector in her little son. Holding back tears that would only wash away the make-up she had painstakingly applied, Kari blew out a defeated breath and headed to the kitchen. “Okay, guys, let’s go! Don’t wanna be late for school.” She slipped two paper lunch sacks from the fridge and grabbed her purse and keys. There was no sound of footsteps so she called again. “Henry, Abby, now!” Moments later, both appeared at the top of the steps, heads down, and Henry - in his big brother way, let Abby walk down first. Without, words, they each took their lunch bags and headed out to the car. Five minutes later, Kari had dropped off both of them – Henry at school and Abby at First Start, and Kari was heading back to the house. Alone in her 4-Runner, sitting at a stop light, she cried.