GEARED

CHAPTER 1
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The View
When driving our car from one destination to another, it is imperative that we have a comprehensive view of our surroundings because it may become necessary to switch lanes or alter our speed before we reach our destination. Therefore, we cannot depend solely on what we see as we look through our front window. The correct positioning of our rear view and side-view mirrors gives us a more precise view of our surroundings. Because of this, one of the first things we should check before putting the car in gear is our rear view and side-view mirrors. If we are unable to observe our surroundings through these mirrors, we make the necessary adjustments.
As parents and educators, our job is to help children excel as they move from one stage in life to the next; from one destination to another. As we assist them, we need to make sure we have a comprehensive view of their lives and their surroundings. Periodically, we need to reflect on our successes and our challenges while interacting with children and make adjustments when necessary. If what we see in retrospect (using our rear view mirror) is not what we desire, we cannot keep doing the same thing. That is insanity! (Doing the same thing and expecting different results.) We must make adjustments in our interactions with them.
We cannot limit our view of children by looking only at the behaviors they expressed in our presence ( looking out of the front window only). In order for parents and educators to effectively interact with children and on their behalf, it is necessary to broaden our view (use our side view mirrors). We broaden our view by being willing to listen to the perspective of individuals working with our children daily. Teachers may observe behaviors that a parent may not observe and vice versa. When we consider one another’s perspective, we broaden our view. When we look through the side-view mirrors, we can detect whether it is safe for us to switch lanes (apply a different strategy in working with the child) or we can observe what is hindering the child from moving forward.
This chapter will give parents the opportunity to do some reflecting on the parenting process and it will also give them an opportunity to view situations beyond their own perspective.

Reflections

For if anyone only listens to the Word without obeying it and being a doer of it, he is like a man who looks carefully at his own natural face in a mirror: For he thoughtfully observes himself, and then goes off and promptly forgets what he was.
-James 1:23-24(Amplified Bible)
Are you having major challenges interacting with your children? Are you observing behaviors in your children that are contrary to the values you have taught them? Do you worry about the destiny of your children? If you are a parent or grandparent who can answer yes to any of the above questions, take this opportunity to reflect upon your position as a parent. As you reflect, don’t forget to use the Word of God as a mirror. Align your actions with what God’s Word says. Go beyond the hearing stage and be a doer of the Word.
Listed below are five scenarios that some parents may currently be experiencing. These scenarios are referred to as parental positions. After reading them, take a minute for self reflection and identify your position. If you do not see a parental position in which you can identify, reflect upon where you stand as a parent in relationship to training your children.
Knowing your current location is mandatory in getting you to your desired destination.
Parental Positions
a. The Discouraged Parent
Some parents may be discouraged because they have taught their children the Word of God and they are still not living godly lives. If this is where you are, don’t give up hope. Parenting is a process and God has made a special promise to parents who train their children in the way they should go. Rejoice! He promised that when they get old, they will not depart from it (Proverbs 22:6).

b. The Condemned Parent
Some parents may feel condemned because they didn’t train their children at an early age and now they feel as if it is too late. If this is where you are, don’t give up hope. The Word of God can meet you and your children at the point of your need if you are ready to be a doer of the Word. Always remember that there is no condemnation to those who are in Christ (Romans 8:1).

c. The Out of Balance Parent
Some parents may not be training their children properly because they are out of balance in the parenting process. They focus all their attention on believing God for changing their children, but they will not spend quality time with them. Remember that faith without works is dead (James 2:26). There are other parents who may be out of balance because they spend time with their children, but the time they spend with them does not include teaching them to live based upon biblical principles. If this is where you are, gear up for the journey of faith you are about to take. God wants to give you His wisdom. It takes application of spiritual and natural principles when we are training our children.

d. The I Don’t Have a Clue Parent
Some parents are not training their children at all. Their children are being taught by television shows, the internet, and by what is popular with their peers. These parents don’t have a clue as to why their children are out of control. You may not recognize that this is where you are if you are leaving your children to themselves because you are too busy working or engaging in other activities. If you are not training your children, someone or something is. If this is where you are, get ready for change because God wants to instruct you and guide you in a manner that will assist you in training your children (Psalm 32:8).

e. The Blessed Parent
Some parents may feel as if they are really blessed because they have great children who are obedient and respectful. If this is where you are, consider yourself as a vessel of God equipped to share your strategies with other parents. You are in an excellent position to become a prayer warrior and a voice of hope to help bring about change in the lives of other parents and children. Romans 15:1 says, Those who are strong ought to bear the infirmities of the weak.

If you are not pleased with your current position as a parent and the results you see in the lives of your children, don’t let disappointment or condemnation cloud your vision of having children that are living according to God’s Word. God has the answers. It’s time to put on the proper gear and shift into a position that is guaranteed to give you peace and success in working with your children. This position is in the hands of God.
Regardless of your position as a parent, it is important to understand that everyone has made mistakes in the parenting process. Therefore, as parents we must find and utilize the strategies that will assist us in leading our children into the life that God has planned for them. Some strategies are natural and some are spiritual. Periodically, we need to reflect upon where we are in the process of training our children. As you are reflecting (looking in your rear view mirror), don’t focus on what you see. Glance and make the necessary adjustments. Focusing on the past will prevent you from safely moving forward.