THE FOURTH QUARTER
You may have attended a football game or watched one on television, and noticed a strange occurrence toward the middle of the second half. On both sidelines you observe all the players holding up four fingers. What is happening? It is the beginning of the fourth and final period of the game, and this is each team’s way of expressing commitment to finish strong and victoriously. You even get excited because you too, feel something special is occurring. You cannot help sensing a renewed enthusiasm and energy among them, despite the fact that they have already played for three demanding quarters or regardless of the scoreboard. Certainly each quarter has its significance, but when the final whistle is blown at the end of the fourth one, we all know the game is over and the score is final. Should the game of life be approached in a similar manner? You betcha!! So let’s begin!!
Before starting, I do not want to minimize the obvious feeling of uncertainty that can accompany this particular period. Health and financial issues often rise to the top. In my case, the gait in my walk is progressively slowing each year, and I have been relegated to “follower” in my daily three mile walk with Snookie. I pray that I won’t outlive my mind. Also, will our resources be adequate so we will not be a burden on others? These two factors in particular (health and wealth) can weigh heavily. But for now, let’s be positive.
Like the first three, I would like to start by defining the fourth quarter…when it begins and when it ends. My review and analysis of the first three quarters have not been that difficult for me for two reasons. First, I had a lot of help from those currently residing in each of these, and secondly, I personally have completed all three. However, this one is much tougher for me. I have no problem determining when it began. I raised my four fingers into the air when I left my job after forty years and joined the ranks of the “retired.” I learned quickly that this is probably the most recognized group in our society. On just about every form there is a place to check “retired.” We tend to be profiled as the oldies and even have national associations vying for our membership. Social Security and Medicare became a common addition to our vocabulary. Such things made it easy for me to define the beginning of my final quarter. But let me quickly add, other individuals may retire much earlier or later than I, so they may claim a different fourth quarter starting point. However, my problem is not the beginning, but the end. I have observed that the fourth quarter in some cases is the shortest and in others it is the longest in this game called life. The game delayers seem to be more prevalent here than anywhere else. I will need to draw from a much broader group to help me better understand the complexities and challenges of this very different quarter; and, most importantly, to define its purpose. For the time being, please allow me to defer defining the end of the fourth quarter until later. However, I would offer this observation, “It’s over when it’s over.”
One of my early duties in the fourth quarter was to grocery shop. After a few training sessions, Snookie sent me alone to pick up a few items at our Kroger Grocery Store. By chance, this first excursion was on Seniors Day; I recognized this immediately because so many older folks were in the store and some buses from the local assisted living centers were in the parking lot. When I arrived at the cashier to checkout, I inquired about the senior discount. Without hesitation she replied, “I need to see your driver’s license to make sure you qualify.” At that I pulled it out and showed it to her with pride since I was evidently youthful looking enough to require age verification. However, this gloating was short-lived, for behind me in line was a nice lady in her late eighties who was in one of those scooter carts. Before, she could place all her groceries on the conveyor belt, the cashier said, “I will need to see your identification to make sure you qualify for the senior discount.” As I was leaving, she looked at me, smiled and then winked. I learned at that very moment that all of us in the fourth quarter have something in common…we need to have a sense of humor even as we covet the respect of others and a definition of our purpose.
For some reason, purpose seems to be harder to get your arms around in this quarter. During the time that I was working on this particular chapter, I read one of my favorite author’s columns in the local newspaper. It was pertinent to this subject; here’s what Dear Abby offered:
“I am a 64-year-old healthy widow…I retired a year ago after a successful 42-year career. I am financially sound. I couldn’t wait to retire because my job was demanding, and toward the end it had become extremely stressful. About two months into retirement – and after taking a few trips – I began feeling worthless and guilty for being nonproductive. I tried a part-time job, but it wasn’t my thing…I feel like I lost my identity when I stopped working…want to engage in some activity that will revive my self-worth. At this point, I don’t know what that will be…SEARCHING FOR ‘ME’”.
I have found this request for guidance to be common among many entering this final period. Interestingly, Abby responded:
“….When people tell me they are thinking of retiring, I always ask, “And what will you be retiring TO? Because I am convinced that retiring to ‘nothing’ is neither physically nor emotionally healthy for individuals who are used to being active.” (2)
Great advice, I thought!
A common response that I receive when querying fourth-quarterers is “I want to leave something for the next generation.” There seems to be a desire to share something of value one has accumulated; pass on an inheritance and establish a legacy. We sometime think of material wealth in this context, but I sense that it is much more than this with most folks. Actually, I believe that things like respect, integrity, values, service, caring attitudes, and just basic wisdom are among the attributes most want identified when their names are called. To be honest, I feel this way, too.
I can cite many more similar examples of struggles, challenges and needs experienced by those making the transition from the third to the four quarter as the end of the game approaches. So, what is the purpose of this final quarter ………..