Charlie, on the other hand, did not need hands on mothering anymore. Charlie was becoming a man and started showing signs that he needed some space. Celia had noticed a change since the letter arrived, Charlie`s mood had become quieter, distant. He would often take to his room, not saying anything to anyone for hours. He was a huge help in the household but he and Celia often butted heads about how things should be done or how late he could stay out. He even started having an opinion on how Chase should be raised which didn’t go over very well with her. He would borrow the car and go for long drives by himself, out to the more rural areas that outlay Chicago. His mother had her concerns. Charlie had his reasons.
He’d drive under the stars and sing to the radio or the tape that was playing in the cassette. He had never sung for anyone before having only found his voice a few months previously but now when he wasn’t in his room playing beautiful music on his guitar “Meg”, he loved to drive alone and sing to his heart’s content with no one else as audience, trying hard not to think about what worried him most.
Celia wanted to keep Charlie from the bar scene until he was of age but he met some older boys who were able to get him into bars and clubs with a fake I.D. He hadn’t been irresponsible in any way but she found him drunk on the front step one early spring morning at 5:30 am.
“What are ya doing out here, Charlie?” She asked him, bleary eyed. She’d only a few minutes more before Chase would be up and going at 100 miles an hour and she was hoping to spend every moment in her bed.
“Waiting,” he said, his head drooping and his eyes heavy.
“Waiting for what, honey?” she asked him gently. It was cold and she wanted to get him inside.
“The Morning Star,” he said as he yawned loudly, and then he continued. “Someone once told me they loved the Morning Star and I realized that I had never been up early enough to look at it,” he told her sloppily. “Of all the millions of stars in the sky, she chose that one to love the most…” He shrugged his shoulders. “I just wanted to see what all her fuss was about.”
“Was she a girl you liked?” Celia asked, unaware of his encounter with the elderly woman all those years ago.
“No, mom,” he shook his head and hung it in frustration. “She was… like… like… one minute she was there saying that she loved the stars and the next she was gone.” He snapped his fingers for effect.
She smiled at him and pulled her housecoat closer, waiting for the Morning Star to make its appearance. She wasn’t really sure what Charlie was talking about but she knew him to be a very talented sweet boy with a dark worry that he carried and drinking it away with the older boys he had started hanging out with was not going to help or further his career. As they sat there waiting, Charlie started humming. Before she knew it, he was singing to no one in particular…
Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch, like me.
I was once lost, but now am found.
Was blind, but now I see.
She had never heard Charlie sing before. For a moment, she thought about joining with him, harmonizing to his singing, but she stopped herself, wanting to hear him. His rich, deep voice was beautiful, filled with passion and heart. He had great range and hit every note spot on. Celia sat thinking how incredible it was that he was blessed to have George’s musicality and her wonderful voice – talk about passing down familial traits! The three of them looked nothing alike. You wouldn’t have taken them as blood relations if you were to meet them all together on the street and yet there was no mistaking where Charlie got his talents from. He could go out into the world and really make something of his life. Much like George had wanted, much like she had wanted. Now it’s Charlie’s turn, she thought, I have to help make this happen for him.
They sat silent for a long time until Charlie suddenly pointed into the sky and said, “Look Mom! There it is.” He studied it for a moment and then said, “It’s so bright.”
Celia looked where he pointed and could see a small bright dot standing proud against a blue and coral morning sky. Wispy, thin clouds completed the picture perfectly. Silence fell over them again until finally Charlie said quietly, “I get it now.” He nodded his head and stood up. He turned around on the front step and held his hand out to his mother, helping her up and into the house. Such a sweet, sweet boy.