Season the Pot

Preview: SEASON THE POT The meaning of “season the pot” is to prepare an iron utensil for use in cooking. Iron rusts easily. A rusty pot would taint the potion cooked in it with a metallic, unpleasant taste. Yet iron is one of the best metals for cooking because it heats evenly, resists burning the contents, and is so durable. Well cared for iron pots or skillets have been passed down from generation to generation. To prepare an iron pot for cooking, and also to keep it in top condition, the cook wipes all the surfaces, inside and out, with a small amount of oil. When ready to cook, the pot is heated slowly before ingredients are added to it. After the meal, the pot is cleaned in warm water. A scrub sponge or brush may be used to facilitate cleaning, but never soap or detergent as those chemicals will dissolve the seasoning and then the pot will rust. In the analogy of a love potion, relationship beliefs are the pot in which the love potion is brewed. The pot is what holds the potion together. The pot makes it possible to add a new ingredient and then mix it in to give the potion added flavor or strength. But if the pot is corroded, a bitter taste may ruin the potion. If the pot has cracks in it, the potion can leak out. To a surprisingly large degree, our beliefs dictate our reality in all areas. This book asks you to specifically look at your beliefs about relationships. Although rarely featured in magazine articles or relationship blogs, the topic of relationship beliefs is foundational to understanding all relationships and helping them thrive. We’ll begin with an intriguing look at the sources of personal differences and how history and other factors construct our unique views of the world including relationships. Each of us then takes those experiences and, either consciously or unconsciously, chooses beliefs based on our interpretation of those experiences. This volume will then answer the question, “Are beliefs taught or caught?” We’ll look at how judging influences our ability to accept differences in another. You’ll learn a truth that will liberate your relationships with others and answer the question, “Does embracing differences mean I have to agree?” We’ll look at a few common beliefs that sour connections and more toxic beliefs that make it impossible for a relationship to thrive. This topic ends with clear instructions about how to replace problematic beliefs with healthier beliefs that produce the relationships you desire. In closing, you’ll find an invitation to take your learning even further by downloading a workbook to further your progress of choosing healthy beliefs. There is also a preview for the next volume in this series, Communication Elixirs. It takes enormous courage to examine our beliefs! It requires assuming some responsibility for creating the relationships we are currently experiencing! What you read here will shine a light on your beliefs and how they affect the quality of your relationships. Without the curiosity to examine your beliefs, the willingness to identify the harmful ones, and the courage to embrace new beliefs that are winners, you cannot mix up effective Love Potions for Healthy Relationships. If the whole topic of relationship beliefs is unfamiliar or confusing, stay with me. You’re about to read lots of examples and descriptions of how beliefs are the container for our relationship experience. It will help if you also recognize these words as having the same or nearly the same meaning as belief: interpretation, thought, assumption, judgment, opinion, expectation, bias, viewpoint or point of view, perception, paradigm and truth (with a small “t”). Now, take a deep breath and get ready for some exciting revelations!