This is the story of my battle with cancer. It is a story of the strength of the Human Spirit and the Holy Spirit. This book will hopefully be read by people afflicted with Cancer or those of you who know someone that is. I am not looking for pity or sympathy. I hope that if you are reading this, you or your loved ones may find a way to help deal with this terrible disease. If you are not really a big reader, do not worry it is a quick read. It is meant to be food for thought so to say. I am not going to make any stupid statements like, "I don't want to offend anyone", or such as that. These days you cannot help but offend someone. I will say, I do not mean to hurt anyone with what I have written here. At times my words may seem cold and harsh to some but this disease is not something to be taken light heartedly. It must be fought with cold harsh determination in order to survive. This is no room for light heartedness. I am trying to portray how much the human body and spirit can take and still go on. It is a story of endurance and tenacity of the spirit.
My statements are meant to reflect how I am seeing God, ourselves and life in relationship to this disease. Some of these words may apply to you personally and some are just referring to the behavior of people in general. I ask that you approach this book with an open mind looking for help and maybe a few answers. I am basically just a normal every day human being just like most of you. I grew up and do still live in a middle class home in Northeast Indiana. I tell you this because I want you to understand there is nothing special about me. I have no special skills or education that make me even remotely qualified to even think about writing a book. I have not studied under the "Dali Lama" or some far eastern mystic that makes me any stronger or smarter than you. I possess no supernatural techniques or anything of that nature. I am just a guy. I am actually not even a writer but after enough people told me I needed to write book and tell my story, I finally decided I had to do it.
I am writing this book to show people there is hope for people who have been afflicted with this terrible disease we call Cancer. I have discovered that after people hear my story, it somehow makes them feel better. Somehow it makes their problems seem a little smaller I guess. Everyone tells me I am some kind of miracle guy or something for having survived this ordeal.....but I think not. I give credit to God and the people in the Medical Community who I know at this point, he guided. After you finish reading, you will understand there HAD to be what is commonly referred to as "Divine Intervention" by God on my behalf or I would not be alive. You will start to notice how much of what most would call "Coincidence" or “Luck” has occurred and seems to be an ongoing part of my life. I do not believe in coincidence or luck. I would also like to thank all of the Doctors and Nurses whose skills, knowledge and expertise have been a part of my healing and my continued life. And even though you may have heard stories to the contrary, almost every bit of my health care has been done through the Veteran's Administration Health Care System. My hat goes off to them. They are extremely overworked, underpaid and overloaded with patients. They struggle with trying to do the very best they can in a system that is bogged down with bureaucracy and too damn many regulations. They work hard to give our nation's veterans health care. They have my deepest gratitude.
I write this hoping that people will understand the sheer will of the Human Spirit and its ability to survive when pushed to the extreme. Our minds are able to make us do amazing things when we want something bad enough. As I have told my children their whole lives, "You Gotta Wanna". I firmly believe that there are spiritual and mental components to healing that are as powerful as medicine if not even more so. I am hoping that after reading this, it may change your perspective and help you see and deal with your illness in a different way. A way that makes you understand that your will power and prayer can become and enormous part of your getting better. Also, I will apologize ahead of time as I am finding that writing a book is no small task. I should also mention that if you are weak of stomach, this book may not be for you. I am very graphic to try and get people to understand the pain and suffering people who have this terrible disease are experiencing. Telling the detail and length of my medical history in in an attempt to help you understand that there are others who are overcoming and making life better through the power of prayer, sheer will and downright personal fortitude. Against all odds, I am still surviving. As I like to say, "By the Grace of God, there Go I".
Our desire to live is inherent in us genetically. It is powerful when we can find our way to see outside our own immediate circumstances. It also seems that the desire to survive is stronger in some than in others. If you have a loved one with Cancer, please be patient, tolerant and loving. If they are experiencing some of the horrific financial difficulties that seem to accompany this disease, help in any way you can. I have tried not to complain about my disease to others but sometimes that just becomes a daunting task. I will say that no one knows what I have really been through, not even my children. For the better part of this they were too young to even understand. Most of the time I felt I was all alone in my battle. Emotional support was all but absent most of the time. It seems no-one wants to be around sick people. Maybe it makes them realize just how vulnerable we are to illness and disease. For those of you out there with this disease, read on and SURVIVE! Take my hand and let us walk together.