Snowbird Mating Season
by
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Snowbirds are a special breed from the north country who can't stand the bite of the first frost, a sky full of grim clouds, or the weatherman predicting that first winter storm. Most Snowbirds are retired people who like to get away from near-artic winters and find a warm, cozy hide-a-way where the sun's rays can keep the arthritis to a minimum and exercise in the great outdoors can keep the body in shape and the cholesterol from clogging the arteries. When the autumn leaves have been raked, the garden tools put away and the golf course closed, instincts as old as time tell them to ready the nest for a quick getaway. It's almost as if they can hear the flapping wings, the quacks, honks, and eerie cackles of thousands of Snowbirds preparing to vee south for the winter. One of the favorite spots for winter nesting is Quartzsite, Arizona. Retired people from all over the United States and Canada descend on this small desert town in flocks that you will never believe, looking for a place in the sun. Quartzsite lies quietly nestled between some of Arizona's most spectacular mountain ranges. It is located eighty miles north of Yuma at the crossroads of Highway 95 and Interstate 10. In summer the population is around 2000. When the Snowbirds converge it swells to 50,000. *** Like the Canada goose, the Snowbird tends to be a heavy-bodied species. When Snowbirds reach the age of 50 and beyond, everything they eat starts developing into what is known as the middle and lower body, sometimes called middle-age spread. The male, along with his long neck, sprouts a large upper stomach while maintaining his slim, skinny legs. The female bird adds to her beauty by becoming more shapely. The bosoms, hips, stomach and legs rapidly blossom into what is known as elegant maturity. My elegant maturity was getting out of hand. "I think we should start some kind of exercise program. Walking around the shows doesn't give us a good enough workout to burn as many calories as we’re eating. It doesn’t get the heart pumping or keep the cholesterol moving through the arteries either," I said. "We stop to look too often." "We need to do something," Beryl said.I always know when I'm getting too fat. When I walk my butt flops up and hits me in the back. I'm blossoming in the wrong places."
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About the Book
Snowbird Mating Season
It was 6:30pm as we rolled down Interstate 10, five miles east of our destination. The blaring CB radio was tuned to channel 19. All of a sudden a confused trucker sounded off loud and clear. "What in the hell’s going on here? I came through Quartzsite a couple of months ago and this town was deader than a squashed lizard. Look at all the campers, there must be thousands of RVs."
"Haven’t you heard?" came the cheerful reply, "It’s Snowbird Mating Season."
The largest segment of our population is nearing retirement age. Many are choosing the RV way of life while searching for the ideal spot for winter nesting. Others are RVing full time. How do you retire and live on a fixed income? Where do they go? What do they do cooped up in a small RV for months at a time? Snowbird Mating Season is written especially for and about those who love the RV way of life. A fine synopsis of what life is like in Southwest Arizona, during Snowbird Mating Season. Second updated edition coming out Fall 2001.
About the Author
Bernita Jackson Brown, born and raised in the small Western Nebraska town of Kimball, is often called Nebraska’s Erma Bombeck. She started writing at the age of 50 after raising her three sons. Bernita and husband Noia (Cork) Brown run a water well drilling and repair business. After many trips running parts and assisting in her family business Bernita wrote her first humor article and had it published in Water Well Journal. She is the author of the book Snowbird Mating Season, a humorous story about snowbirds (retired people) who fly south for the winter, taking their nests (RVs) with them. Bernita has been published in Western Nebraska Observer, Camping & RVMagazine, and Winter Resident News & Views. For the last two years she has been writing for a new magazine for RVers, RVCompanion. Although Bernita likes to write humor she is very serious about her walk with Christ and her fellowship with the Holy Spirit as portrayed in her new book Jesus In My Golf Cart.